Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on May 6, 2011 21:06:05 GMT -5
Considering how quickly the missive I'd written in what I hoped was a concillatory tone had been answered in a less than pleasant one I'd known the relationship I might have with my daughter may have to be a hard-fought one. How self-righteous could Caraf get, acting as though my request was me trying to treat Emilia like a tract of land when she knew my upbringing! It had immediately set my nerves on edge and brought up exactly the same sense of futility that had caused my behavior with Calista- not that it was right, but there it was.
I'd cleared my schedule for the next day after her final letter and then rode to the house where Caraf was staying with my cousin Juliette- they'd been friends, or so I remembered, so there was little surprise in that. Whether she'd be any help or not remained to be seen but I wasn't counting on it, so the next best thing was to play the polite gentleman, get the arrangement that worked most to Emelia's benefit and then leave without causing more of a scene. No child needed that, even if they were young enough they'd not consciously remember. After the door was answered I made my wait into the sitting room and waited, running a hand back through my hair and forcing myself to stay calm.
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Post by Caraf Tewar on May 7, 2011 20:04:04 GMT -5
I was in the room that Emilia and I were sharing when one of the servants came to tell me Elliot was here.
Rising, I ran a hand over my hair, even as I wondered why I was doing so, and then scooped Emilia up in my arms. She laughed and I couldn’t help but smile back. Leaving the room, we made our way downstairs. I kissed Emilia’s nose and she giggled loudly, the happy sound filling the air like golden bells.
She was still burbling with happiness as we entered the sitting room where Elliot was. Smiling as I looked at him over Emilia’s golden locks, I said, “Hello, Elliot.”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on May 10, 2011 18:15:27 GMT -5
With everything that had been going on in my own mind I'd forgotten how cheerful the baby could be in almost any situation and as she and Caraf entered the room a smile crossed my face to see my daughter fairing so well. And Caraf as well, but there was much between us that made it more difficult to see her the same way I had before. For now I simply let that go for the sake of the discussion that would be happening soon, as well as my daughter's contentment. She may have been too young to understand the specifics but arguing always set her on edge.
"Hello Caraf," I replied in turn, standing up and walking over to where she held Emelia and reached out a finger to brush it over her plump, soft cheek that babies always seemed to have when they were healthy and happy. "You look as though you're doing well, and Emelia is as cheerful and healthy as ever, though I'd never expect otherwise with her being your child." What did you say to your former wife when negotiating the ability to see your own child? "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on May 12, 2011 23:56:38 GMT -5
“Not at all,” I said, the smile staying on my lips, though mostly due to how Emilia was still giggling and reaching for Elliot’s finger. “She’s had her nap and a snack so she’s up to a visit if you’d like her to stay.”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on May 17, 2011 11:59:20 GMT -5
Emelia grabbed my finger and I let her hold it for a moment, more glad to see her than I possibly could have expected. Hopefully none of this would stress out my daughter any more than it had to. "I think I would like to stay, thank you," I replied with a pleasant smile of my own as I slipped my finger from the baby's grip and offered my arms to take her from Caraf. "How have you been?"
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Post by Caraf Tewar on May 17, 2011 18:57:08 GMT -5
I let Elliot take our daughter and then moved to sit on the couch.
“Well, thank you,” I said. For our daughter, I managed to maintain the pleasant tone in my voice as I asked, “Yourself?”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on May 27, 2011 10:23:38 GMT -5
There was a part of me that wondered if I even should have asked, but common courtesy was important at this point for the sake of my sanity as well as Emelia's. I may have grown up wondering why I'd been abandoned by one parent just because they couldn't handle the other but I'd be damned if she'd end up the same way. We may not have been together or even cared what happened to the other but for the child's sake we both needed to be involved in her life. "Also well," I replied with a pleasant smile as I sat down in a chair and let Emelia rest against my shoulder, where she giggled and tugged at my ear. "And so is Emelia, it seems. I guess that means we should get to the real topic of discussion then." With the rate this was going this conversation would devolve quickly into awkward silence or drinking, and possibly both, and it was best to forestall that possibility.
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Post by Caraf Tewar on May 27, 2011 14:37:56 GMT -5
I was torn between gratitude that he’d moved on so quickly to business, and a tingling of sadness at how things were between us. I had loved Elliot with every fiber of my being, the only person I had ever loved more was Emilia, and now it was just gone.
“Of course,” I answered, my tone still on the more pleasant side but not without effort. I have never intended to keep her from you, nor will I do so in the future.”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on Jun 1, 2011 20:39:17 GMT -5
As much as she said she'd never intended to keep my daughter from me I still remembered that she'd left without a moment to let me explain and taken Emilia with her. That was in the past though, nothing could change it and there wasn't any inclination to try and rebuild that bridge. "I never meant to imply that you did, but it would make more sense for us to have some sort of organized arrangement," I said in a calm tone, smiling all of the while and raising a hand to gently loosen the babe's grip on my hair. "I was thinking about bringing her to my estate on the weekends."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on Jun 2, 2011 15:44:48 GMT -5
“Not for whole weekends at a time, she’s too young to be away from me for that long,” I said, shaking my head slightly. “She’s still nursing Elliot. Any really long period you want to see her is going to require me to be around as well.”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on Jun 8, 2011 10:50:38 GMT -5
"I can hire a wet-nurse, Caraf," I replied in a sensible tone, though inwardly I was bristling. Staying calm was important, since breaking down into a yelling match may result in her trying to keep me from my daughter and me trying to get others involved. I didn't want Caraf in my house though, not so soon after our breakup and the dissolution of our marriage when things were still fragile. It would be too easy to slip into old habits. "Otherwise I'll be here every day for about four hours to have my time with her. I deserve to have time alone with my child."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on Jun 9, 2011 16:57:56 GMT -5
My head had begun shaking as soon as he mentioned a wet nurse. “No, I will not have another woman nursing my child,” I said, trying to stay calm, but adamant.
“I am not trying to deny you time with her Elliot, but while she is still so young it is going to take compromise on both our parts. I am willing to bring her to wherever you’d like, you don’t have to see her here, but if you want to see her for long periods I will have to be around. I don’t intend to supervise or monitor or anything like that, but some things can’t be avoided,” I told him, managing not to raise my voice or snap.
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on Jun 9, 2011 17:32:38 GMT -5
It should have been obvious that she would refuse, even if it didn't make any sense, and already my own ire was starting to slowly rise. Her child? Emelia was our child, conceived by both of us, and I'd supported both of them during that time. It was my money that had bought her clothes and toys, Caraf's things as well, and my home and resources that had seen to their comfort. I'd be damned if anyone was going to say she wasn't my child as well, and while I ran my fingers over Emelia's soft hair I steadied myself. Yelling now would only make things worse and I needed my wits.
"She's my daughter as much as yours and I am doing my best to compromise," I said in an exceedingly patient tone, as though I was talking to someone about to lose their temper. "I'm willing to compromise and leave Emelia in your care for the majority of the time because you are her mother and you are a good one. However I will not allow you back in my house under those conditions. For an hour or an afternoon, of course, but never overnight, not again. That all changed when you walked out without even asking me whether the charges against me were true or not. We both have our limits, I'm sure of that, and that one is mine."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on Jun 9, 2011 18:13:54 GMT -5
“I don’t want back in your house Elliot, not ever. The only thing that could make me step foot in there again is Emilia. As for having walked out on you, you left me a long time before I moved out. When that note came trying to blackmail me to keep what you’d done quiet, it wasn’t what broke us up, it was just the push that got me to face it.” I stopped, pressing my eyes closed and looking down as I drew a deep breath and fought for control of my emotions.
Opening my eyes again, I looked at him once more. “I think that neutral ground would be the best solution, nowhere that is yours, and not here since you seem unhappy to be here for long. I don’t want to be a part of your life Elliot, but that is impossible to accomplish since we have a child together. So, we need to find a place and arrangements that are acceptable to both of us.”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on Jun 13, 2011 13:05:20 GMT -5
There was a definite possibility that this could devolve quickly into an argument about emotional matters rather than a discussion on the well-being of our child, but as much as I wanted to retort with how it took two people to make a marriage but all of that was besides the point. What needed to be considered were the facts. She didn't want me to take Emelia to my house for a weekend for whatever reasons she had and my options that would have solved the matter were being ignored. Stick to the facts, Elliot, and treat this like any other negotiation.
"This house belongs to my cousin, who as far as I'm aware still has no ill-will from me and also hasn't heard my side of the story," I replied in a rational tone, turning my head to give Emelia a smile and then settling her on my lap. "So this suits as neutral ground. That still doesn't change the fact that I would rather spend time with our daughter alone, as I have given you the chance to do while this matter was settled. I'm a man, I can't nurse her, but I am capable of hiring people who can do that job well. Neutral ground or not."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on Jun 13, 2011 15:53:41 GMT -5
His side of the story… there it was again. Not that I was surprised, Elliot had always adept at playing the victim.
“If you are willing to spend time with Emilia here, then the arrangements should be easy. I will be here while you visit, but I will stay in the library or another area where it is unlikely you would be with her. When you arrive, one of the maids can bring her to you, and when she needs to be fed they can bring her to me. We need not ever cross paths and that will leave you her nursery at the rest of the house to visit her in. Does that suit?” I asked, my voice calm and completely rational.
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on Jun 13, 2011 17:24:43 GMT -5
"But this is still your residence," I replied sensibly, looking at Caraf calmly. Did she really think this was going to work? "But in a compromise both people sacrifice something for the deal and I'm failing to see where you're reaching for middle ground. It's almost as though you're saying that simply allowing me to see my own daughter is enough that you're not required to bend on any other matter. Emelia is my daughter, and I have supported her- and she stays with you constantly without my contact up to this point to save her from any disagreement between us. But I deserve the same right."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on Jun 13, 2011 17:42:53 GMT -5
“So, this is not so much about you getting to spend time with your daughter in an environment that will be comfortable and happy for her as it is about scoring points and making sure everything is even,” I replied. “Arranging our lives around when you decide you want to see her and then having to go hide away is apparently not enough from me I see. Juliette was kind enough to let us stay here and Emilia is happy here; there has been enough disruption in her life, but if you insist then I will take her and we will live with my parents. Then, when I can bring her into the city, you can see her here. You are her father Elliot, but I am her mother and I will not agree to have her raised by servants.”
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Elliot L'Envers
Noble
His Grace the Duc L'Envers, Sovereign Duc of Namarre
Posts: 2,923
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Post by Elliot L'Envers on Jun 13, 2011 17:51:11 GMT -5
As soon as the words left her mouth the smile left my face and I fought not to stiffen, to stand up and yell every word I could have thought of. Money-grubbing adept, whore, traitor, all of those words came to my mind, but I knew they would be spoken in anger and mostly untrue. Maybe she had loved me once, maybe she hadn't but it didn't matter now.
"Are you threatening to leave with my child?" I asked in a low, carefully controlled tone. "I'm suggested she be fed by servants, much like you yourself are for every meal, not raised by them, and you are currently trying to arrange my life to your schedule rather than finding a true compromise. But I will not let you run off with our child, or let you use her against me. I do have rights in this, and if necessary I will use them and petition the Crown for the rights to see my child and heir."
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Post by Caraf Tewar on Jun 13, 2011 18:07:20 GMT -5
“I am not sure how trying to give you the neutral ground you said you wanted is threatening to take her from you, but if this is how you want this go Elliot, then fine,” I said, rising. “When she is old enough to be eating nothing but food prepared in a kitchen, then things will be different. Now, she is too young. I am not trying to make plans for the rest of her life, just for now and things can be adjusted later.”
I took the step that closed the distance between us, and scooped Emilia off his lap, holding her to me.
“I know how you were with her when she lived under the same roof, you would not change her or bathe her or do any of the things you could pawn off on a servant. She’s a baby, Elliot, not a duty or hobby. I’ve given you the options that I will agree to for right now. Agree to them, come up with an option that doesn’t involve another woman nursing her, or petition the crown, those are the choices.”
As I talked, I moved away from him, rocking Emilia as I held her. Tears welled in my eyes and I begged them not to fall.
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