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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 2, 2011 23:54:37 GMT -5
I could hardly believe it, but Kendrick had been true to his word - he'd bought me a house. It wasn't quite ready to move into, but Azriel had given me some money to decorate and buy furniture, at Alex's behest, I was sure. I'd spent the morning ordering the painter's about, and now that the walls were all shades of blue and brown, I was rather pleased with the effect. The baby's room especially, adjacent to mine with a door connecting the two, had turned out beautifully. I had ordered furniture and that should be coming any moment, so I was at this moment wandering around and trying to hang things on the walls, but my stomach kept getting in my way.
I'd sent a note along to Sinclair, asking him to come over and see the house, and now that it was getting on in the afternoon, I was beginning to think that he wasn't going to come. Well, I couldn't blame him, we hadn't seen much of each other since I'd told him I was pregnant, and I knew a lot of that was my fault. Getting away from the drugs and alcohol had also meant a lot of time locked in my room trying to fight off the urge to do something stupid. Still, I was disappointed that I hadn't seen him yet.
I flopped down into the one piece of furniture in the sitting room, a lone divan that had been the first piece to arrive. It was a deep chocolate velvet with cream accents, and incredibly comfortable. I was wearing a pair of Kendrick's breeches, tied below my belly and rolled up at the ankles, and an old tunic of his, which was now spattered with paint. My hair was pulled up and piled atop my head, tendrils curving down my neck, also paint-spattered. With a sigh, I curled up and closed my eyes to rest ... just for a moment.
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 6, 2011 15:05:53 GMT -5
Since Naia had told me of her pregnancy I had yet to speak to her. We had both been busy, I was certain and I had searched for her in our usual places, though our usual places were seedy areas and bars... hardly appropriate for a pregnant woman and not knowing where else to go, I merely had to wait for her to show up or stop caring at all if she did not wish to contact me anymore. So, when I got her missive I was a bit surprised, but it was welcomed, definitely. Since then, I had lost everyone I could have turned to and yet in the lingering of the back of my mind, I knew she was a Shahrizai, but it seemed both of us had lost our place and I was hungry for a conversation in which I did not have to defend myself or yell (much) that I hurried through my chores and headed over.
She was a Shahrizai. I had warned myself of such with Gabriel, and I knew I just had to keep myself more guarded, even with Naia. I knocked once and opened the door and was met with... well, what seemed to be utter destruction. It was fitting of Naia, especially a place that belonged solely to her. "Naia...?" I called cautiously as I entered. I had kept it in mind to buy her a few things with what little coin I had available--a cheaper bottle of wine and a few of the candies that I knew were hers to call her own, from Alangora. I found her on the divan and I flopped down next to her, it was only then, seeing her belly, that I realized wine was inappropriate.
I frowned and rolled my eyes at my own idiocy. "I need it more than you do," I said, uncorking it as I put the bag of candies on her rounded belly, which balanced much to my amusement. "Do you have glasses yet or am I allowed to just drink out of the bottle?"
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 6, 2011 19:37:39 GMT -5
I heard Sin before I saw him, but it was too much effort to get up and show him into the sitting room... well, the one room with somewhere to sit in it, anyway. He found me nonetheless, sitting next to me and balancing something on my stomach. I made a face at him, but brightened up when I saw that it was my favorite little candies. I'd gone through my stash weeks ago and all of my coin was tied up in the new house and baby things, so I hadn't been able to replenish. I gave a little squeak of delight before waving my hand negligently.
"No cups ... well, I mean, I have some, but I don't know where they are right now, so yeah, out of the bottle is fine." I made a point not to even look at the bottle, which I imagined to be calling my name in an evil voice, the voice of temptation. Still, I had been away from it for several months now, and it was getting easier.
I busied myself by popping a piece of candy in my mouth instead, and it was so heavenly that I forgot about the alcohol and simply closed my eyes, savoring it. Why were those so amazing? I didn't know what she put in them, but Gods, there was nothing else like it. Finally, I opened my eyes and looked over at Sin.
"So, what have you been up to, my favorite Valerian?" The only one I actually knew, despite a few trips to his House in my time here. I held up a candy and grinned at him. "And thanks for the candy, it's just what I needed after a hard day of painting and waiting around for the furniture to be delivered."
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 6, 2011 20:12:00 GMT -5
“Perfect,” I said, taking a swig though I made sure not to get completely careless and dump it over the both of us since it was still relatively full. I looked down to smirk at her at the candy. “Well, you have that and I have this baby,” I said, patting the wine bottle. It had cost me quite a coin for all of this, and somehow Alangora had sensed that was the reason for my absence and had threw in a couple extra for free, as if she also knew Naia needed it. Damn Tsingano... I swear she could read minds. “Favorite? I’m practically the only one who dares to associate with you,” I said with a roll of my eyes as I poked her on top of the head as she devoured and relished what I had given her.
“Ugh, same old same old... my life is a complete mess and they’re talking about kicking me out of Valerian House, what’s new?” I asked, not wanting to complain too much about myself yet I couldn’t help it. I quickly turned the conversation on her, “But at least I’m not pregnant to a bastard of a man, I suppose, so that’s a plus for me.” At least I had not been THAT stupid, though I swore if I were a woman i would probably have found some idiotic way to get pregnant.
“The girl I was in love with has her grabby hands over a Mandrake who just finished his marque and has now opened a salon and I made a complete idiot of myself at your natal, in summary,” I said, rubbing my forehead. “In truth... I’ve felt alone,” I said, a bit confused at my sudden confession. I rarely allowed anyone to get close and maybe this was not the wisest choice with a Shahrizai, but she had been the only one who had been there for me thick and thin. “Thanks for the letter I really needed to get away,” I said softly, “And I did not know where to find you.”
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 6, 2011 23:16:06 GMT -5
I laughed, agreeing with his assessment - and besides, I had found I really didn't know what to do with a Valerian, in the traditional sense, once I had one anyway. I rather liked Sin, who was brash and bold and angry and altogether not what one would expect in a Valerian. I liked the way he made his own way, the way he wasn't afraid of things, and in truth I admired him as much as I liked him.
"What would you do if they did kick you out?" I asked, alarmed for his sake. I sat up and tried to fold my legs underneath me, the way I used to, but failing miserably because of the thickness around my midsection. Sighing, I kicked my legs out instead, resting them on his lap.
"Well, Kendrick might be a bastard," I said in response, "but he's a rich bastard so I don't think I've done too badly." I gestured to the house, one step away from being in the glamorous North Borough, and grinned. "I mean, look at this place. It has six rooms. Six!" It occurred to me that if he was having troubles at Valerian, I had more than enough room here. "Plenty of room for a rogue Valerian, if he needed a place."
I felt bad when he brought up his love life, which was as abysmal as mine. "I'm sorry, Sin," I said, reaching over and giving his shoulder a squeeze. I had been so focused on my problems that I had let this distance grow up between us, and all along he'd needed a friend as much as I had. "I have been all over the place since this happened... Gadleon's, Azriel's ... that's why I asked Kendrick for the house, in truth, because I am tired of being bounced around, and I want my son to have a stable home. You're always welcome, you know that." An idea was brewing in the back of my mind, but I wasn't sure if it was something I could pull off, or that Sinclair would even want, but it was there, entrenching itself into my thoughts.
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 6, 2011 23:52:35 GMT -5
When Naia asked me what I would do if they did kick me out, I was entirely silent and I shrugged my shoulders, appearing nonchalant for a moment before it broke and I let out a sigh I felt like I had been holding in for months. “I don’t know...” I said with a sigh. “I barely know my parents... and apparently I have two younger siblings that they never bothered to tell me about,” I said grimly, clasping my hands in front of me. It wasn’t like me to talk about this too in depth, but it was hanging on my chest and Naia was surprisingly a good listener. “I’m barely a good adept so... I don’t know, I really don’t,” I shook my head, refusing to look at her.
True, she was pregnant but still fortunate that her baby’s father was rich and cared enough not to leave her and run for the hills. It was surprising, finding Naia independent and taken cared of. I had always written her off as a situation similar to mind, not sure where I belonged, unable to exactly care for myself and to suddenly see her in this situation hit me hard. And then, well, I had to repeat it in my head but then I heard her saying it had six rooms. Enough... enough for a rogue Valerian.
I didn’t speak for a long time, allowing the grim silence to draw out between us. “T-Thank you,” I said, unable to believe a stammer had been brought out to my voice. I just did not typically expect anything from anyone other than what I deserved and I certainly didn’t deserve this. I gasped, then laughed, surprised to find the corners of my eyes wet and I hoped for my sake, Naia would not mention it as I turned away and wiped my eyes on my sleeve. “We’d drive each other completely insane and I’m sure Kendrick wouldn’t like it at all,” I turned to her, grinning. “But that’d be way too much fun to make him pull out his hair.”
I could... almost see it. Trying to keep Naia from killing herself or her baby accidentally but it seemed too good to be true. “I’ll just... keep it in mind, thanks.” I dismissed it, but I hoped Naia knew how much that meant to me. Imagining myself no longer having the name 'Valerian' and something coined of my own or even... Shahrizai was just absolutely ridiculous. How ironic and totally implausible.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 8, 2011 3:11:11 GMT -5
I wanted to ask him about that, about being an adept, and why he struggled so hard against his House, but I knew it was something that I didn't understand and that the subject was sore for him, so I never asked. One benefit of my heritage was seeing things that others did not, and in Sin I saw things that I knew he wouldn't want me to, and while I was likely not the best friend a person could have, I would never use those things to hurt him, or even speak of them.
"Oh, Kendrick," I said, laughing and pretending that I did not notice anything amiss. "He would likely never notice if we didn't mention it ... I doubt he means to spend much time here." I was surprised at the note of bitterness in my own voice and I quickly pushed past the subject.
"Would you be interested in that?" I asked carefully, the idea in my mind taking shape, though I wasn't too sure it would stand up to any scrutiny. "Not being at Valerian anymore, not necessarily being here." The two were not synonymous after all. I wondered, though, if Sin would truly wish to be free, and for once I was not going to go haring off on my own and doing something that might backfire.
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 11, 2011 0:13:33 GMT -5
“I... I don’t know,” I said, leaning back into the arm of the couch as I drew my legs towards my chest, feeling strangely vulnerable for one of the first times in my life. With Gabriel I had my moments of vulnerability, even with Anixiel, but I had let them in... this was different. With Naia, it was as if I were wide open and read like a book as it were. I rubbed the back of my head, wondering what had happened to my other siblings. I could barely even remembered if they had been dedicated or not and one of them had yet to be born by the time I had turned away and left Valerian. Once we made our marque, it seemed typical of my family to spend some time at home. I didn’t feel welcome. I hadn’t spoken to them in years and I wondered if I was just a whispered black word in the corridors or if they pretended I didn’t exist altogether.
“I keep.... I mean, what would I do?” I asked, looking at her with a sigh. “Nobody ever asks me that question. I guess it’s just always been a joke about whether or not I even will finish my marque so I never think about it.” I sighed, flopping and putting my legs on Naia’s (though I was careful to mind her stomach). “Ugh. I only have an inch or two on my marque. It’s absolutely pathetic.” And of course the best patron I had had in awhile I had driven away and had to get much too involved with.
“Sorry,” I commented, looking her over. “I know you are pregnant and the like I uh... how’s it going? Do you think it’s a boy or a girl?” I almost hoped it was a boy, as if I were going to stick around long enough to help her raise it. Funny thought, that. I didn’t belong in her house let alone near her child. “Do you... ever regret it?” I asked, looking her over, wondering perhaps if my question stung too deeply.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 12, 2011 16:05:47 GMT -5
It seemed like Sin and I were alike in several ways, because I didn't really know what I was going to do either. I had wanted independence, and now I had, and well, now what? What did day to day life look like without the haze of alcohol or drugs, without the constant pain and anger and obsession with my past? I had let those things go, but what did I replace them with?
"I don't have an answer for that, I barely know what I'm doing," I said, laughing and pushing a stray, paint-spattered lock of hair out of my eyes. "Anyway, who cares how much you have on your marque anyway, it's nobody's business." I wondered how much that would affect my plan, but it didn't truly matter - adepts didn't come cheap, regardless.
When the topic turned to the baby, I grinned and rested my hand on my belly, feeling the babe move at my touch. "It's going much better now, I stopped being sick all of the time a couple of months ago. I definitely think it's a boy, even though I keep being told that there's no way to tell and I shouldn't be too sure. I can't help it, though, I just know it's a boy." His next question was more personal, but the answer leapt to my tongue immediately.
"No, actually. I mean, at first I was scared and upset, but now ... well, I don't know, the baby has made me look at things differently. In case you haven't noticed, no more drinking, no more opium and no more hating my sister for imaginary crimes. And no more feeling sorry for myself." I said the last more forcefully, because it was the hardest, and the truth was, I was still working on that one.
I gave Sin a wry smile and then winced as the baby kicked. "He's very active, do you want to feel?"
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 13, 2011 3:31:04 GMT -5
She had changed. It was odd, seeing her almost mature and almost grown up. In some ways, she had been my mirror, the two of us opposites and yet so very alike. And here she was, grown, with child and not doing anything idiotic anymore. Hell, no more drinking or drugs for Naia. She had gotten a hold of her life even though she didn't know what she was going to do with it. Was that what I needed? To have something knock me over so hard that I completely had to reevaluate my life?
"I... sure," I said, leaning over to put my hand on her belly. When the baby kicked, I flinched, despite myself. I had never been around a pregnant woman before, let alone felt a baby kick within her stomach. "A boy, huh? I think that'd be better for you. I honestly cannot see you toting around a cute girl." She needed someone hardy, someone that could help take care of her later in life. I liked the idea.
"Any names yet?"
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 13, 2011 4:03:22 GMT -5
I laughed softly when he flinched ... hadn't I felt the same when the baby first began to move? But eventually, I'd come to love that feeling, because it told me that he was all right, and it made him that much more real to me.
"I keep trying out different ones," I said, making a face, "but nothing sticks. I have been scouring my limited library for new names to try out, but nothing so far. Right now I am trying on 'Sebastian.' What do you think? 'Sebastian Deveroix?' " I laughed again, leaning in as if to impart a secret. "I promised Kendrick the surname would be Deveroix, and all it cost him was this house. I do think I'm getting better at driving a bargain, don't you think?"
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 13, 2011 20:50:30 GMT -5
"Sebastian sounds like he could be a pretentious bastard like Kendrick," I said with a roll of my eyes as my hand idly rubbed her belly, occasionally feeling the child kick within her. I wondered how that felt, someone kicking you from the inside. I couldn't imagine it was anything pleasant. I laughed aloud and rolled my eyes when she told me how she ha gotten this house. "I was beginning to wonder but I suppose that explains it," I said, reaching over for my wine bottle as I took a long swig of it. "Well at least you aren't having his child for free, I suppose..." Though it would make it harder for her to get married to anyone except him.
"Well make sure you give him something that won't scar him for life," I said with a slight laugh. "Please put SOME common sense into your child's name, even if that uses all your common sense for a week."
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 13, 2011 22:00:38 GMT -5
I had to laugh at that, shaking my head. "All right, Sebastian is out," I said. "How about something common, like Henri, or Jacques... Marc?" I hated all of those names, actually. Nothing simple or common for my child. "Any ideas?" I asked him, watching him drink the wine with a pang of desire that made my stomach hurt and it was all I could do not to snatch it from him. The baby's movements were the only thing holding me back, a reminder that it wasn't just my life anymore.
"Kendrick only cares about the baby's surname, so I'm on my own for a first name." I paused and then offered, "Benedict?"
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 24, 2011 0:07:21 GMT -5
"Naia are you completely and utterly deaf?" I said, my eyes narrowing a bit. "Do ANY of those names sound good with the last name you are forcing this child to have?" I snorted a bit as I laughed and rolled my eyes. "Nah, I've never thought of baby names," I said honestly and shrugged my shoulders. "Look, there's still time and I'm sure what you blurt out when you see your naked, blood covered baby is going to be perfect." I meant that, though it hardly seemed like it as I smirked, downing a bit more of the wine with a tilt of my head. Saying that Naia's first judgment was going to be "fine" seemed like a long shot, but I trusted her with it.
"So... after this baby is out and you find someone who can watch it for a day, we got out, first thing, okay? Just you and me and a bar."
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 27, 2011 19:24:56 GMT -5
I made a face at Sinclair's description, pushing his leg off of me as my stomach curdled slightly. "Ew, Sinclair, that is disgusting." I pushed myself up off the couch - a feat in itself - and then held out a hand to him.
"Come see the baby's room, I spent all morning painting a mural." I'd missed my painting, and decorating my own home with my own work seemed appropriate. Somewhere I had sketches of so many things, including Sinclair, though I didn't think he'd like that. He always looked so vulnerable in my sketches, for some reason...
I purposely didn't respond to his last remark, not sure if I could see myself in a bar again, for all the work I was doing to stay out now. I also couldn't imagine leaving my baby with someone else, though I knew it was common enough. He had lain here, under my heart, for so long now that the idea of being without him seemed so empty and well, lonely.
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Feb 27, 2011 23:32:05 GMT -5
"Disgusting but true. I mean, do you honestly expect that crying thing that's been sitting in your stomach for the past few months to just be in there, completely clean and come out of THAT," I said, pointing to between her legs, "brand new? I don't think so." I snorted a laugh as she pushed me off though I got up from the seat so that I could help Naia from hers.
"Alright, show me where you are going to store the thing," I said, eyeing her up and down. I barely noticed that she had not even answered my question. It was hard to imagine Naia attached to anything, even a child, but I was not the one pregnant nor did I think I would ever understand such an affection. It was just... an impossible emotion for me to understand. I let out a low whistle when I finally got into the baby's chambers.
"When you said you were painting I thought you just threw some paint on the walls... this is... actually pretty good," I said, looking it over, hands clasped behind my back. "I didn't know you could paint."
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Feb 28, 2011 0:29:37 GMT -5
I was absurdly pleased that he liked my work, even though I knew I was a good painter. I'd spent so much time on it, ever since I was a child, but it was still nice to be appreciated by someone whose opinion I actually cared about. I stood with him and surveyed the scene, a landscape of lush fields and trees, and there among the flowers and sparkling blue lake, Elua and his Companions, lovingly rendered, most especially Kushiel, for whom I of course held a special affinity.
"I'm glad you like it," I said, linking my arm through his and resting my head on his shoulder. In one corner of the room were the pieces of the baby's crib, which needed to be assembled. I pulled my head back and grinned up at Sinclair. "While you're here, maybe you can help me with this crib?" I gestured at the components, strewn about the room in a fit of frustration. "I know I could just pay someone to do these things, but I want to do it myself." Well, myself with help, but that was close enough.
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Mar 2, 2011 1:51:59 GMT -5
It was strange, looking into the face of Kushiel. He was not the god that I worked for, whose marque was on my back, but even so I wondered what he thought of me, what he thought of this... this relationship that I had with Naia. Unconventional and yet still, as one would expect. A Valerian and a Shahrizai. Even so, Naia and I were so much more, so... we weren’t anything like that at all. I flinched a little when she suddenly linked an arm through me and rested her head on my shoulder. It was close, intimate contact without being sexual. Odd, almost, but I leaned my head gingerly against hers, as if I was afraid I’d break her.
“And by help you with this crib you mean make it myself, right?” I said with a roll of my eyes as I gave the pieces a look. “It doesn’t seem too hard, I think I can figure it out.” I was on me knees within the next few moments, beginning to assemble it for her. I removed my jacket and rolled up my sleeves. At least somehow, this way, I could be useful.
There wasn't even so much as a complaint from my lips.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Mar 2, 2011 2:02:22 GMT -5
I laughed softly and shook my head. "No, I'll help, honest..." But I didn't move, not at first. There was something so endearing about seeing Sinclair like this, putting the crib together without a word of protest. It was so ... paternal. Like Kendrick with the room he'd put together in his home. Was it all babies that brought the best out of people this way, or was there something special about this baby?
I dropped down to my knees next to Sinclair and pulled a piece of paper from the ground. "These are the instructions... look, here's a list of all the pieces that are supposed to be here... maybe we should count them?" I tried to lean over and grab a piece, but my stomach made that impossible. Sitting back on my buttocks with a loud huff, I sighed and looked at Sin.
"I cannot wait to have my waist back!"
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Mar 2, 2011 2:11:52 GMT -5
"What? So you can fit in those tiny dresses of yours again?" I asked with a roll of my eyes as I looked over at the paper, beginning to set certain pieces of the framework aside so that I could get this right on the first try. It seemed lately, all I had been able to do was mess things up, if this was the only thing I could do, fix a simple crib for someone I occasionally called friend, then I would do it. I was beginning to assemble the framework and stood, leaning one base against the wall as I fixed the other before I was able to put the two together. With some difficulty, I got all four pieces of the base to lock together so that it was standing, though it had no bottom or sides just yet.
"Getting there," I murmured simply, intent and quiet as I worked, fixing the barred doors first, then the bottom. It wasn't too long before I had everything assembled together and I pushed the finished piece into the corner of the room, my arms aching a bit from all the hammering and pushing.
"It looks like the picture at least, I suppose..." That was a good sign.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Mar 2, 2011 2:19:42 GMT -5
I rolled my eyes and threw a screw at him. "No, so I can move and stop feeling like a beached whale." He was past paying attention to me, however, intent on fixing the baby's crib. I shook my head and scooted out of the way, leaning up against the wall and resting my hand on my belly. I needed the rest anyway, my back was aching and I was exhausting from all of the effort involved in moving into the house.
For awhile we didn't speak, and I just watched him work. He was graceful and - I'd never noticed before - beautiful in his way. Without a frown or a smirk on his face, he looked so different. I wonder if I was the same, now that I was no longer mired in self-pity and rage. I hoped so, because that wasn't the mother that I wanted for my baby.
Eventually, I managed to lumber to my feet, though I did not interrupt Sinclair. Instead, I went downstairs and made us a pitcher of tea, filling it with ice so that it would be cool on such a warm day. I managed to get the pitcher and two glasses up the stairs without falling down them, a feat these days, and I set the drink in the windowsill as I surveyed his handiwork thus far.
"Impressive, I always thought you were only good at breaking things," I teased, pouring a glass of tea and offering it to him.
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Mar 2, 2011 2:26:54 GMT -5
I was grateful when she brought me some tea as I had worked up a bit of a sweat fixing the crib, though I was glad it was done and gave it a good shake and lean on to make sure that it was sturdy enough and I had not forgotten anything. I took the glass, silent for a long while when she mentioned she thought I was only good at breaking things, even though it was merely a jest, I couldn’t respond for quite some time.
“I thought so as well,” I said simply, drinking down the cold tea. I looked at the paintings on the wall, and a gentle smile flitted to my features. “And I could say the same for you.” It seemed the two of us were experiencing change, a lot of it, growing up finally for the better. What was happening to us? We seemed to create so much havoc. Did it cause such an upset to finally get us to calm down?
“Thank you, Naia,” I said and did not elaborate. If it was for the tea or for something else entirely, I did not say.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Mar 2, 2011 23:52:38 GMT -5
I had to smile at that. "Touche, Sinclair." I surveyed the crib, impressed at the job he'd done ... it would have likely taken me hours and who knew if it would have been done correctly?
"You're welcome," I said, leaning against the window sill and looking down over the garden. I was going to have to find someone to tend it and some servants and ... the realities of having my own home were beginning to settle in and I wondered if I should have chosen something less extravagant.
The mood in the room was not quite somber, but serious, and I smiled at Sinclair in an attempt to lighten it somewhat. "We're quite a pair, aren't we? Two people who would rather be drinking wine or liquor, sharing iced tea. Who would have thought, a year ago, that we would be here today?" And who would have thought that I would be all right with it?
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Mar 6, 2011 15:11:38 GMT -5
I had known her for a year now, hadn't I? And it seemed that she was the only stable thing in my life even though I had pushed her aside and out of my mind, I was surprised to find how much I needed her and the other way around. I was surprised to find that I needed anyone. My relationships that had crumbled before me had been a blow to my already shaky world, but somehow, Naia was like a reflection of myself. If somehow I lost her, I was not sure what I would do despite how unpredictable and immature she was. I supposed, I was quite the same and we seemed to not expect much of one another other than good company.
"Indeed," I said simply, deep in thought as I looked her over. "Almost seemed like the work of Kushiel himself, us meeting at that bar. Who'd have thought that the most typical relationship of them all could be so much more?" A Valerian and a Shahrizai who did not bed one another, did not even touch one another in that way and somehow, had turned out so deep? I sat down, leaning against the wall as I looked her over.
"And maybe it was the fates at work to befall a child upon you that you would turn out to love." And I? To suddenly face the reality of my actions, which weighed heavily upon me. "And I'm going to finish my marque on my own," I said finally. I would not take a charity act to do so, even from my dearest friend. "I'll figure out a way how."
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Mar 6, 2011 18:42:14 GMT -5
I had to laugh at that - he was right, of course. Shahrizai and Valerian, such a typical pairing, and yet, we were anything but typical. Of course, I imagined that there must be reasons besides the obvious that we Shahrizai were drawn to Valerians and vice versa, there was a draw, a shift in the blood. Sin and I complemented each other in a way that I had never experienced with anyone else.
"Maybe," I said, resting a hand on my stomach. "It's so strange, and I don't think I would tell anyone but you, but at first, I was panicked. I just wanted to be rid of it, but the more I got used to the idea, the more I just fell in love with him. I can't wait until he's really here." I took another sip of me tea, then added, my tone almost defiant, though it wasn't as if Sin were arguing with me, "I'm going to be a good mother, and regardless of whatever it is between Kendrick and I, my child is going to be loved, and know it." Whatever my faults, I was determined that my child would never feel as alone as unloved as I had growing up.
"Are there other ways you can make your marque, you know, besides the obvious?" I had never really given it much thought, but if he could bring in revenue some other way, might he be able to work his marque off without doing things he obviously had no wish to?
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Mar 7, 2011 0:15:23 GMT -5
"You're going to raise him right," I said simply. As much as I hated trite comments, this was not one. I could tell, I believed in her and it seemed the child was setting her straight. Why did it take such a huge upset to finally set us back on the right path? I leaned over to place a hand against her belly, feeling the child move within her. It was hard to imagine that a real person was living within her right now, something she was nurturing. In fact, it kind of freaked me out a little bit just thinking about it. What wonders the gods held, didn't they?
"I... yeah. I mean, I've been working for someone," I said simply. "On the side. It's uh... okay, this is going to sound questionable but uh... so... there's this guy? I don't know, he found me not the other way around, apparently he had been asking around. He uh... has me deliver packages to certain patrons that he has contract me. It's weird." I frowned a little. "But it pays well and it kills two birds with one stone so I suppose I'm not complaining," I said with a light shrug.
"Anyways uh..." I said, reaching into my pocket as I flipped a coin towards her, an adept token. "You probably have plans but maybe I'll see you there if you get sick of fake smiles and Kendrick, eh? Maybe you can snag yourself an adept for free willing to sleep with you despite your large belly and extra package," I laughed, trying to brush off the seriousness of the matter with humor.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Mar 7, 2011 0:37:03 GMT -5
I was pleased that Sinclair seemed to agree with me, because I had had it up to here with all of the doubtful looks everyone else was always giving me. Only Alex truly had any faith in me, and she was practically a stranger!
"It does sound a little questionable," I said, smiling as he rested his hand on my belly and the baby kicked softly. "I mean, as long as you're safe, but what could be in the packages? I'd hate to see you get in trouble..." I sounded like his mother or something, totally unlike myself, but I found that I really was worried about him. Still, he was a grown man and it wasn't my place to tell him what he should or should not be doing. "Just be careful, all right?"
When he invited me to the Night Court party, I caught the token with a laugh. "How did you know I was going with Kendrick? He's actually been rather pleasant lately..." I twirled the coin between my fingers, "Well, not pleasant exactly, but less surly, if you can imagine it."
I laughed and then sighed, "I cannot imagine trying to sleep with someone in this condition..." Not that I didn't want to, my libido had skyrocketed during the pregnancy, but I was becoming so ungainly and I felt rather unattractive for it. Besides, I had a feeling that Kendrick would not take kindly to the idea, regardless of whether or not I found an adept who was willing. "But I'll keep this in mind, maybe I will be able to hit both parties before I fall asleep too early as if I were my old aunt Prissy."
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Post by Sinclair nó Valerian on Mar 20, 2011 5:47:59 GMT -5
"I do not have an idea," I said with a slight frown. "But considering the fact that he needs me to deliver it under the disguise of an assignation it cannot be anything good... not to mention the fact that his patrons are more than questionable." And the things I had done with them made me question. I rolled my eyes a little as I looked over at her. "I will try my best, I assure you, Naia."
I needed to clean up my life, but one step at a time. The deal I had with Dennis was uncertain and questionable, but for now it was a good distraction and gave me enough money to put away towards my marques when my patron gifts were less than amazing.
Again, I found myself rolling my eyes, which I seemed to do a lot with Naia, when she asked how I knew she was going with Kendrick. "You are bearing the man's child in your belly right now and you ask me how I know you are going with him to a party, really?" It had been... a bit of a big deal for me to give Naia that coin. I had never given such a thing to anyone and Naia and I were not even lovers. She meant so much to me, in her, I saw too many reflections of myself like a deep pool. So, I invited her anyway, extending the offer in case she did change her mind.
"Ditch him, if you bore of him, I will wait for you."
The way I said it, I could feel myself lingering, exposing myself into the open with such a declaration and it almost scared me, though I knew she would not hurt me. At least... on purpose. I rose then, sighing.
"Well, I should be heading back to Valerian House any time soon, but thank you for inviting me. If you need anymore help, you know how to find me."
It almost sounded too nice for me, to be honest but somehow... in the span of a day I seemed to understand our relationship so much more. I couldn't lose her like I had lost everyone else.
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Post by Naia Shahrizai on Mar 20, 2011 15:53:19 GMT -5
I reached for him, giving him a hug unasked for and that he would likely disengage from as soon as possible, but I couldn't help it. I did not possess the means of telling him how much his friendship meant to me, not with words, but I would do it in any other way possible. After the disaster of my birthday party, I still felt the need to make it up to him, somehow, only know I was aware that what he wanted and what I thought he did were not one and the same. I was going to be mindful of that, from now on, but only time would show it to him.
"Thank you ... for everything," I said, gesturing at the crib as I stepped back, but I really meant so much more. "I'll try to find you, at the fete." It should not be too much trouble to convince Kendrick to leave early, he was not one for big parties, as I recalled from the Princess' welcome fete.
I watched him go with a small smile, my heart lightened just in knowing that, no matter what, there was one person surely in my corner.
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