Prince Delaunay de la Courcel
Royal
His Royal Highness the Duc de Montespan, Prince of the Blood; House Courcel and Montespan *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Son of Prince Imriel de la Courcel & Laurette de Montespan.
Posts: 2,360
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Post by Prince Delaunay de la Courcel on Apr 15, 2010 19:56:08 GMT -5
I followed behind her, keeping a distance then held my place a little ways away as I watched her retrieve the water before bringing it back to me. I took it up in my hand and murmured my thanks before I took a sip and sighed, listening to what she said.
"I'm not sure how to fix any of this." I replied to her then. "How to fix you, or me, or what had happened. I know I want to try again, and I know that I want to do what I can to help you. But I really don't know what that requires; most of me is still wishing we were on our honey moon, making love and thinking about names for our children." I sighed again, moving to a table and placed the glass down, returning to a spot by another window.
"I'm lost too Aza," I replied gently over my shoulder. "My thoughts, my actions... I'm lost just as much as you." I looked back to the window and inhaled before breathing out and leaning forward to press my forehead on the cold glass, my hand came up and pressed to the pane, thinking on what to say, what to do, what would fix this or help it heal.
"I never thought it would happen either," I said softly. Unsure if she would hear me I turned around and looked at her. "That day, when you left...." I shook my head a little remembering. "I spent days crying, not leaving my room, and I've done very little since returning. Most of my days I drink and cry, feeling as though my chest would break open at any moment with the amount of pain that's been boiling up inside me." I clutched my chest a little then and took another breath, looking at her as I let go. "I heard you were courting some one already, there was a rumour you left the masque early to be with a man; that you had been seen in the company of an Aragonian business man." I fought down the tears that welled. "All I could think was that I had drove you to that; that was me, with my... my violent nature." I near spat at the words. "You deserve some one that takes care of you, that doesn't hurt you like I did, I keep thinking that if I really loved you I'd let you go, let you grieve so that you can have a normal life without a monster like me." I looked down, tears filling my eyes before I looked up at her.
"I am a monster Azabel, for everything I did that day, for my selfishness. What I did... was unforgivable. Part of me thinks I did it just so that you'd leave, so that it would be over and you'd see what I was really like. That perhaps you'd realize you never really loved me." The tears in my eyes welled up so much that they began to fall again; then I laughed, bitterly.
"Ah Elua Azabel, I don't want to give you up." I said in a breath, leaning back onto the window sill with both hands before sitting against it. I leaned forward, propping my elbows on my knees and put my face in my hands. For a moment I just cried, I don't know what from, from everything I guess, I just needed to cry.
"I don't want to give you up." I said again, this time I looked up at her, though still bent over. "I want to work this through with you, I want to try again. Not in public, not in front of the whole country, and certainly not in front of Sabrina, but I'd like a chance to rebuild your trust, to so you that... yes... I made a mistake, but that I take responsibility for it. That I'm not just spouting pretty words to be given your good favour just so that I get your body back. I want you to just... give, me, a chance... just a small, tiny chance." I stood up then moving toward her, not stalking, at least I hoped not, until I was in front of her. I reached down and took up her hand in mine, taking a risk, though I made no other move then to just hold it.
"Please Azabel, I ask nothing of you then to give me a chance, in private. I want to talk to you, I want to talk about what happened, I don't want you to be afraid of me. If you want to go out and court every man in the city, then do it, you owe me nothing and I would ask for nothing... other then just, one, chance." I took her hand and placed it palm down over my heart, my eyes focused on hers. "Lets be happy again, together. Lets find our way out of the clouds together."
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Princess Azabel de Somerville
Royal (Manager)
Her Highness, Princess of the Blood; House Somerville *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Posts: 2,048
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Post by Princess Azabel de Somerville on Apr 15, 2010 22:10:20 GMT -5
I watched him as he sipped the water as I had, putting it down near untouched. I watched him, my eyes following his movements, his face.. the worst was watching him cry. Delaunay de la Courcel, strong as anything I'd ever known, tougher than anyone I'd ever known. He knew his limits, knew the limits of everyone around him, and knew how to use his stature alone to get what he wanted. Mind and body, he was a force to be reckoned with, a force to make you step lightly, or make you feel protected and safe... sitting on the floor, his head in his hands.. and crying.
"Del," I said softly, tears of my own trickling down my cheeks, but I lapsed into silence as he continued talking. When he mentioned he'd heard I was courting someone, my mouth fell open, and when he described them vaguely I closed my eyes. Balta. One night. One night, and I couldn't even have that without society tearing me up and spreading rumors. I needed to protect Baltas identity as much as anything; he didn't need this coming down on him, too. I listened to him as he spoke, the tears continuing to fall down my face, and before I could make my way to him, he was standing before me, taking my hand in his and cradling it.
My tears fell, and I nodded wordlessly, my eyes on his. My mouth was pressed together as I fought not to sob, my breath shaky in my lungs, and I just nodded. Closing my eyes, I laid my forehead against his chest. I wanted to tell him I wasn't courting anyone, but now wasn't the time. My breath jerked in my lungs as I fought back the urge to cry harder, and I turned my face, pressing my cheek against him, slowly edging closer, closing the distance between us. My free hand went about his waist, and I held onto him, wondering what life was going to be like from here on out.
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Prince Delaunay de la Courcel
Royal
His Royal Highness the Duc de Montespan, Prince of the Blood; House Courcel and Montespan *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Son of Prince Imriel de la Courcel & Laurette de Montespan.
Posts: 2,360
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Post by Prince Delaunay de la Courcel on Apr 15, 2010 23:19:46 GMT -5
She held me in her arms, just held me, and I thought; may be... just may be things would be alright. No promises, no demands, no restrictions or engagements, just the posibility that we may have something again. Gods! I would even settle for just being friends with her, even if she did take her time and court others; I said I would wait and I would.
Slowly, carefully as to not touch her back, but not touch anything that would get me into trouble, I wrapped my arm around her waist in return, just about her rear and just below where the welts began. My hand still held hers against my chest, craddling it there as I tipped my head enough to press my cheek to her head. She smelled wonderful and wild, and it made me smile that there was something left in us to go on.
"I love you Azabel," I said softly and then thought otherwise. "You don't have to say it in return, I don't want you to if you don't want to say it. I didn't say it to hear it in return," I took breath. "I just want you to know that, to know I truly do." With that I smiled, the first sign of happiness washing over me in what seemed like years, for the first time in months I felt cheerful that things would work out.
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Princess Azabel de Somerville
Royal (Manager)
Her Highness, Princess of the Blood; House Somerville *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Posts: 2,048
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Post by Princess Azabel de Somerville on Apr 15, 2010 23:48:24 GMT -5
He moved so carefully, tenderly placing his arm around me in a way that didn't cover my rear, but also left the expanse of my back alone. He didn't crush me to him, didn't pin me, just held me gently. I felt the need to sob lessen and slow, felt the tears begin to dry, and my arm tightened around him harder for it.
His cheek touched my head. Odd, that I should pay attention to all the little details, like how I could feel his jaw through his flesh. Like how he held my hand so peacefully against his chest, the fabric of his shirt crisp and clean, like it was freshly laundered.
I love you Azabel. My eyes closed when he said it, and I listened to him, trying to soak everything in and digest it. I love you too Del... and that's what always makes everything so hard. If I didn't love you, I could walk away, and you could be free too.
I answered him in my head, and for a long moment I was silent, listening to the beat of his heart as I had time and time before, listening after making love, or falling asleep on him. I listened, and for a moment I could stop crying, could sigh softly. "I love you too." A whisper, but it was said, quiet and soft.
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Prince Delaunay de la Courcel
Royal
His Royal Highness the Duc de Montespan, Prince of the Blood; House Courcel and Montespan *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Son of Prince Imriel de la Courcel & Laurette de Montespan.
Posts: 2,360
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Post by Prince Delaunay de la Courcel on Apr 16, 2010 0:36:14 GMT -5
I released a breath I didn't know I had been holding, her words made me close my eyes and relax within our embrace.
"Azabel," I said gently, still not pulling back from her. "I really should go." I whispered. "Believe me I don't want to, but I shouldn't be caught leaving your rooms this late at night, nor early in the morning." My hand moved from her back and stroked her hair. "I want to see you again, or... may hap a letter... I'm not sure." I continued to caress her hair, almost petting it. "What would you like?"
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Princess Azabel de Somerville
Royal (Manager)
Her Highness, Princess of the Blood; House Somerville *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Posts: 2,048
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Post by Princess Azabel de Somerville on Apr 16, 2010 9:49:50 GMT -5
He had to go, and I nodded in understanding. "No, no one needs to know... Elua, I don't know if it's better or worse that I'm staying in the Palace now. There always seems to be someone around, but there is back at my brothers home, too."
I sighed softly, weighing the options. I was getting tired; it had been an incredibly long day. "A letter probably," I said, thoughtful, trying to concentrate. The wine was wearing off, but in its place was sleepiness. "It would probably be best, for now... I need to.. think.. and we can orchestrate a meeting through it." I didn't want him thinking I didn't want to see him, but I was afraid of moving too fast, too. I looked up at him, wondering if he understood. The night stretched on...
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Prince Delaunay de la Courcel
Royal
His Royal Highness the Duc de Montespan, Prince of the Blood; House Courcel and Montespan *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Son of Prince Imriel de la Courcel & Laurette de Montespan.
Posts: 2,360
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Post by Prince Delaunay de la Courcel on Apr 16, 2010 14:38:15 GMT -5
I nodded silently as I looked down at her. "A letter it is then." I replied. "I can always have it sent through Phreya, it might not be the best but you can always claim that you and her are friends and that you two wanted to remain so despite our break up." I gave a little shrug. "I could find other ways to conceal a letter, there are people I trust that would be willing to help me communicate secretly." I stepped back just a little and put both my hands on both of her upper arms. "I think its good for you to stay here; its not like I'm around the palace that much and it would be very easy to stay way. I know we both need some space to think about this night and decide how best to proceed." I took a breath and exhaled slowly. "Even if we don't... end up back together. I'd at least like to come away from this with some sort of friendship with you, and may be thats the best place to start." My hands rubbed up and down on her upper arms in a comforting sort of fashion.
"May hap if we're friend first then anything that happens past that point would only be stronger because we're friends first." I gave her a gentle smile.
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Princess Azabel de Somerville
Royal (Manager)
Her Highness, Princess of the Blood; House Somerville *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Posts: 2,048
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Post by Princess Azabel de Somerville on Apr 17, 2010 13:03:57 GMT -5
Phreya. I never really knew her, and part of me wondered what kind of eyebrows it would raise that I was suddenly close enough to her to trade letters.. but at the same time, mayhap it wouldn't be too odd. Her brother and I, recently wed and divorced both; mayhap an odd sort of friendship would follow with it. I nodded a little. "Reese.. I might be able to send something through him. He wouldn't say anything," I added; I loved my brother, and missed him terribly. I hoped he wouldn't take it amiss if I spoke to him about this. "There are always ways."
His hands ran over my arms, and I found myself biting at my lower lip at the surge of emotions that flowed through me. My eyes were dry of tears, and I didn't waver as I looked at him, my gaze taking in his, the sadness of it, the hope, the pain and want for a better life. A friendship; if anything were to happen, it would start with that. I nodded again. "Friends," I agreed softly. I was tall for a woman, tall enough to look most men in the eye, but I still had to look up to his eyes. Tiredness creeped in me, and I fought the urge to lean against him. "I think that's an very good idea, Del. It would be nice to call you my friend."
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Prince Delaunay de la Courcel
Royal
His Royal Highness the Duc de Montespan, Prince of the Blood; House Courcel and Montespan *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Son of Prince Imriel de la Courcel & Laurette de Montespan.
Posts: 2,360
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Post by Prince Delaunay de la Courcel on Apr 17, 2010 13:53:14 GMT -5
I smiled, gently but still hopeful; I leaned forward and pressed my lips to her forehead, kissing her gently before pulling back and releasing her completely, my arms falling to my sides.
"I'll send a letter tomorrow." I said softly. "Tonight, you sleep." I reached up and cupped her face once more before turning, heading in the direction of her door.
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Princess Azabel de Somerville
Royal (Manager)
Her Highness, Princess of the Blood; House Somerville *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Posts: 2,048
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Post by Princess Azabel de Somerville on Apr 17, 2010 14:13:31 GMT -5
I closed my eyes when his lips touched my forehead, drawing in a soft breath that I exhaled when he pulled away again. "Tomorrow," I repeated softly, turning as he walked towards the door. By the time he reached the door, I was smiling, ever so softly. "Goodnight, Delaunay."
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Prince Delaunay de la Courcel
Royal
His Royal Highness the Duc de Montespan, Prince of the Blood; House Courcel and Montespan *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Son of Prince Imriel de la Courcel & Laurette de Montespan.
Posts: 2,360
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Post by Prince Delaunay de la Courcel on Apr 17, 2010 14:15:56 GMT -5
I turned the knob of the door and pulled it open gently before turning back to look at Aza.
"Goodnight Azabel." I replied, my smile blooming a little more at the happiness that was filling the moment. With that I went through the door and out into the halls, saying nothing, and not even looking at the guards as I passed the, headed back out to my carriage where I had been headed before such a fate full meeting.
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Princess Azabel de Somerville
Royal (Manager)
Her Highness, Princess of the Blood; House Somerville *Voted Member of Worst Character Dynamic 2010*
Posts: 2,048
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Post by Princess Azabel de Somerville on Apr 18, 2010 16:24:03 GMT -5
Oh sweet Elua. As soon as the door shut, I felt my knees quiver again, and I sank down upon the floor where I stood. Del. Who'd have thought that we'd meet as such, and had it go as such? I didn't know whether I wanted to cry or laugh, or simply curl up and go to sleep where I was.
Delaunay was my first love, my largest. I'd cared for men before him, but no one had held such a wide, such a long standing affection as the one I'd carried for him. From the day we'd met as teenagers to the day he returned from Kriti to find he was to marry me, we'd always been secure in our affections. If things had never really been easy with his nature conflicting with my own, well.. Not every relationship was easy. We had love, and that was enough... or so we'd thought. Love, above all, love... but love hadn't been enough to save us.
Now, on the eve of my visit to pay homage to Kushiel and pay for my sins, Delaunay and I met up again. I couldn't help but wonder if it was the obvious hand of mighty Kushiel, or pure coincidence... but in the end, it didn't matter. Delaunay and I had reconciled on a very, very basic level; not yet friends, surely not lovers.. acquaintances. Acquaintances who had agreed to talk, and no more. I didn't know if he thought I was courting someone else, but right now it didn't matter. Friends. My thoughts turned to Balta, and I smiled softly before finding the physical strength to stand again. One by one, I turned out the lanterns before crawling into bed, wearing naught but the silk robe I'd thrown on. My back ached, and I rolled to lay on my stomach, trying not to think.
With a sigh, I fell asleep.
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