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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 11:07:15 GMT -5
Nodding in aquiescence I started to play, my fingers following the keys as I watched them for a moment to make sure the rhythm was right. This was a tune without sung words, as my voice was nothing special, and finally I raised a brow questioningly as I looked at her.
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 11:10:22 GMT -5
I nodded happily as he looked at me, encouraging him to continue. Then I closed my eyes and began to sway slightly as I listened to the music.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 15:56:38 GMT -5
Smiling and nodding in return both at her acknowledgement and at seeing her so happy I continued, letting the music flow from my fingers with skill if not exactly art- I am no Eglantine, just a person who enjoys putting skill into something and a personal love of music, but it served me well and the practice showed.
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 18:01:07 GMT -5
Opening my eyes again, I pulled my knees up and rested my chin on them as I watched Gareth. He always looked so content when he played, like no matter what he could loose himself in the act of playing, I envied him that slightly. Mostly, I was just happy to quietly listen and watch for as long as he wanted to play.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 21:21:51 GMT -5
Slowly I began to ease into a good repeating portion where I could change between a few simple chords and continue strumming as I talked. "So, how have you been? Anything interesting happen?"
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 22:35:23 GMT -5
"I spoke with Trinette and she agreed that I should try out teaching Avrielle. I just came from our first lesson," I told him, watching the movement of his fingers.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 22:46:03 GMT -5
"And how did it go?" I asked conversationally and with a note of curiousity. "Did you find assessment apt?"
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 22:50:49 GMT -5
"It went alright," I said, trying to decide on the right words. "You were right about her responding better to a girl closer to her age. We seemed to get on well enough. She seems…." I paused as I struggled for the words. "She's far too certain of things. As if she believes she could spend the next six months reading books and then step into an assignation and survive."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 22:57:35 GMT -5
"I always felt the books were better as reminders of lessons one has already done but it's not like she has the time to sit in classes and learn as we did," I replied serenely. "The books and a couple tutors is all she has. The only way for her to learn may be to have her first assignation bring it home to her. Too bad there aren't any showings scheduled- seeing a good one may convince her otherwise."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 23:01:20 GMT -5
"I think she understands more now. After I… " my voice trailed off, unsure how to tell him of what I had felt. I looked down and chewed at my bottom lip.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 23:03:51 GMT -5
Cocking my head sideways slightly I shook my hair back behind my head from where it had fallen forward from looking at the chords and raised a brow. "What?" I asked calmly. "It can't have been anything too awful, I know you better than that."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 23:10:53 GMT -5
"No, it wasn't awful. Nothing either one of us couldn't have done without giving it a thought before, during or afterward. It was… it was the way it made me feel. I liked having her obey me when I told her to strip and kneel. I have never felt like that before," I confessed.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 23:16:37 GMT -5
"In every interaction there must be one passive and one dominant- that is the way of things," I replied, a thoughtful expression on my face. "You were in a position of power on many levels and used it to the best of your ability to accomplish a goal."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 23:20:50 GMT -5
I chewed at my lip again as I thought over what he'd said.
"That could be it," I said, nodding slightly. "I just never felt like that. It wasn't as if I wanted to hurt or dominate her, but I enjoyed how she responded to me."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 23:26:01 GMT -5
"A lot of things have been beyond your control lately- I can understand your being a little pleased when things did fall into such a situation. When things settle down again and you heal as much inside as out I'm sure things will fall into place again." Stopping my hands in their playing I reached out and pushed some hair behind her ear. "Everyone feels that way sometimes, the life we choose is not an easy one."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 23:30:08 GMT -5
I leaned into his touch, drawing reassurance from it.
"I've never felt as if I chose this life. I've always felt as if it chose me. You of all people know how naïve I was when I arrived here," I said, smiling with the memory of the first time I met Gareth. "I suppose it's just another part of growing up."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 23:35:58 GMT -5
"It may choose us, but we don't have to accept it," I admonished playfully as I touched the tip of her nose and then withdrew my hand to settle my hair again. "Avrielle thinks that she chose it freely but she will learn that she must submit to her own nature as much as that of others."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 9, 2006 23:42:15 GMT -5
"I don't believe she truly wants to submit. She wants to be overpowered, forced. And only her body, not her mind she says. It's a very different thing than what I feel, crave."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 9, 2006 23:46:35 GMT -5
My brow wrinkled in thought. "How can the body submit when the mind does not?" I asked curiously, mostly to myself. "She has no idea the sort of force that an angered or irritated patron would use to secure such a thing."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 10, 2006 10:39:30 GMT -5
"Like I said, she doesn't really want to submit. She wants to be taken, overpowered. She will be fine for those patrons who only want to play at dominance, who would cringe at the thought of actually hurting someone." I looked up at Gareth and grinned. "You know, the patrons that would you and I completely unsatisfied."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 10, 2006 10:57:16 GMT -5
"Yes, I understand exactly what you mean," I replied, thinking of some of those sort. "Still, those type to come to Valerian and she will suit them well I should think. It lowers our chances of being left with that type when our skill lies elsewhere."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 10, 2006 11:08:00 GMT -5
"Very true," I said, with a laugh. The laugh turned into a sigh. "I hope that I am proceeding correctly. I've never had an individual student before. Even when I would help out with the younger children, it was always watching over a group."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 10, 2006 11:28:26 GMT -5
"An individual student just means that you have to individualize the lesson more, make it personal," I replied. "You sound as though you're doing fine, just remember your place and who you are. If you need help you know I am more than happy to do whatever I can."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 10, 2006 11:34:02 GMT -5
"I know," I told him, smiling and reaching out to softly squeeze his hand. "And I will almost assuredly be coming to you for help, brother." My smile became a mischievous grin. "Older brother. Much older, wiser, mature, old brother."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 10, 2006 11:42:27 GMT -5
"You are most welcome, young, flattering, sneaky, somewhat confused little sister," I teased, my own smile widening as I wrinkled my nose.
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 10, 2006 14:29:29 GMT -5
"Only 'somewhat confused'? I must be getting better at hiding how truly confused I am," I said with a laugh.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 10, 2006 17:24:32 GMT -5
"But of course- otherwise you would be in a constant state of paranoia. After all, you know as much as everyone was willing to teach you."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 10, 2006 20:31:49 GMT -5
"I know more than that, dear brother," I said, standing up and reaching out to ruffle his hair into his eyes. "For I am sneaky and learned things people wouldn't teach me."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 10, 2006 20:40:30 GMT -5
"Then you know more than me, for I taught you everything I know," I replied, shaking the hair out of my blue-green eyes. "Except for the things you didn't want to learn, like how to play music."
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Post by Douleur nó Shahrizai on Oct 10, 2006 21:04:55 GMT -5
"I have no talent for it, not like you," I told him, smiling. "I should go try and figure what I am going to teach her tomorrow."
I leaned in and kissed his cheek.
"Thank you," I told him. "For everything."
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