Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 14:48:34 GMT -5
I flushed hotly. "My mistake," I said softly. I could feel myself losing faith in my ability. First lesson, and already I was forgetting everything. I brough my hands to my temples and closed my eyes, trying to regain my focus. Opening my eyes again, I smiled at Gareth, to let him know that I was listening, remembering everything. "I understand, that's why the rings are so high off the floor." The thought of dangling there, helpless, set my skin ablaze, and I knew that if a patron wanted this, they would have no trouble compelling it of me.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:09:43 GMT -5
"Exactly," I said in an encouragine tone- shehad been warned that this would not be an easy road, learning so much in such a short time. "Safety is always very important because there are so many dangerous variables at work. No matter how soft the tools a patron can still harm or kill because it can only take bare hands to do so."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:11:54 GMT -5
"I see," I said. "Have there ever been cases where adepts have died because of a patron's lack of caution?" I hoped none of the cases were recent, that would be especially terrible.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:19:17 GMT -5
"of course," I replied with a nod. "Part of the thrill comes from thge danger and sometimes you really will find it. That is why some adepts refuse flechettes. Fortunately, the murderers are always caught and justice served, part of the reason we are always so strict about contracts."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:21:45 GMT -5
I gave a nervous laugh. "I thought flechettes were only used to break the skin."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:26:00 GMT -5
"They are deadly sharp and pointed- and riding crops are only used to encourage horses to go faster," I told her with a raised brow. "Cut the right skin- across the inner thigh, wrists, throat- and you will die. They may be small blades but death can come just as quickly for it."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:33:39 GMT -5
I shuddered. Dying in the assignation chamber...what a way to go. Nevertheless I understood his point: Tools can be used...and misused. "Which book should I study to learn all the safety rules and regulations?" I asked him. "I have a reading list already, but there is so much more I need to learn."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:37:01 GMT -5
"I have a few picked out," I replied. "The stack in the library is all things you should look over and will be asked about. I suggest you study the reasons for those guidelines along with the rules themselves so, should you ever need to, you can make a judgement on your own. There are always new tools coming into existance and the books can never quite keep up."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:41:27 GMT -5
I laughed at that. "I will pick them all up on my way back to my room later," I said. "I am always up late reading nowadays."
Realizing that we had deviated from the topic at hand, I asked him: "What kinds of knots do patrons use in conjunction with the rings?"
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 15:53:34 GMT -5
"Whatever they can manage- those with skill will do ones either that do or do not slip depending on their will but the rest will just tie something."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 16:11:49 GMT -5
I nodded, ready for the next part of his lesson. There was still so much in the room we had not touched on, particularly the sinister looking whipping cross against the wall.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 16:27:21 GMT -5
"Next is the saddle-stand," I said, walking over to a modified pommel-horse type device that had handles and straps all over it. "This is for when a patron would rather bind you bent over," I said. "It's pretty self-explanitory, so just let me know if you have any questions about it."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 16:33:01 GMT -5
I examined it with a smile, knowing it to be the kind of tool I always imagined myself favoring. "This one is good," I said. "It suits me. Do they come in different sizes, or are they all standardized?" It seemed that taller adepts might need larger ones.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 16:40:48 GMT -5
"Standardized, as all that is required of this is to give you something to hold on to as you are struck. A taller person would simply stand further away before bending over. Most tools are only of a few types- those to hold you in position, cause immobility or titilate the patron."
It would be best to start with what she liked, as that would keep her going to learn those things she preferred less. "You have permission to wander for a moment or two and look at what you will in order to ask questions but do not touch any of the tools- this is simply to do with the furnishings," I warned.
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 16:57:00 GMT -5
"Yes, Gareth," I said obediently. I smiled to myself.
The whipping cross scared me, but intrigued me nonetheless. I crossed the room to look at it. It was smoothly rendered and polished, with loops at the ends of the lengthwise crosspiece and at the foot. Careful not to touch it, I stretched my arms out as far as I could and closed my eyes, imagining the tension that could build without being able to properly see the patron. It made me shiver and smile. I realized that it was not the structures that I was so scared of; a cross, a pommel-horse, all were things I could take and knew I would enjoy. It was the more sinister tools I feared, and I knew I would need to tell Gareth this. Again, that metal-tipped cat, like a bad dream, flashed through my memory.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 17:25:41 GMT -5
As she worshipped at the iron cross I let my gaze wander over the room- they were all as familiar as nudity to me by now and caused me as little trepidation. I let my own mind wander again, gaze becoming abstracted as I thought.
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 18:55:32 GMT -5
Quietly, I called out his name. "Gareth?"
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 19:14:23 GMT -5
"Yes?" I replied immediately as I looked over at her. "That is as simple at it looks, not much to be said that you can't see for yourself."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 19:30:17 GMT -5
"No, I understand it perfectly well," I said slowly, "it is the manual tools that I think we ought to concentrate on." I explained my logic: "I fear some tools because I do not understand them, or I have exaggerated their effect in my mind. I of course will study everything, but the tools I think are most important to study, that I may grow used to the idea of them."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 19:54:15 GMT -5
"Understanding will not change the effect it has when you see it in the hand of one who intends to use it on you but that is only my personal opinion. You were fixated on this item and I thought it best to bring you back into reality. Unless you are with a patron or lover you trust with your life you should always be aware of your surroundings, no matter how difficult it may be." The worrying part of her rushed training was that she may never get the safety training ingrained that we so needed in this House and I didn't want to see those fates befall anyone.
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 20:07:07 GMT -5
I tried to hide the frustration I felt, but all I could say was, "Yes. I understand." I wanted to him to teach me everything he knew, and I intended to make that clear to him. I was not soft, only ignorant.
Spreading my hands, I met his eyes and said seriously. "Then teach me. Tell me everything, make me work hard, teach me safety rules, guidelines, regulations, everything, until I can recite the effects of a bullwhip or a paddle backwards in my sleep. I am an open book, I am ready." I made my tone as serious as I could without pleading. "I know that sometimes I can be foolish or get carried away, but I am ready and willing to take steps to overcome those weaknesses."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 20:17:10 GMT -5
"It isn't something that can be told," I replied steadily, giving her a look of deep patience. "And saying you are ready is a sign of the exact opposite. You know bed-tricks surely but these are tasks of survival. Knowing a patron's intentions for you, the anger that lives in his very soul, whether he or she will want you to plead as though you are dying or desiring of their flesh or any number of other things. Here more than in most other Houses people will have their illusions and quirks and the slightest error can result in punishment. One wrong look, one wrong statement- that is all it takes from an assignation to go from what we consider normal and put it in the realm of real danger."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 20:26:06 GMT -5
He slowly but surely was taking me apart, reducing me to the core of myself, and it was terrible to feel. I did not cry, as I felt like doing, and I did not leave the room. I said nothing at all. I did not know what to do, or what he wanted of me. I was not born of this house, until not so long ago I did not even know I would end up here. I just knew that I needed to learn, needed to be taught. But I was not weak and I would not let him believe such. So I did not turn my gaze away. I just looked at him, awaiting his instructions. He was my teacher still, and I would respect him as such.
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 20:29:25 GMT -5
Taking a deep breath I patiently said, "To learn you have to tell me what you know and make your own connections. All that can be offered to you is raw knowledge, which I have offered to you. What do you know of Valerian? You have been reading- what have you read?" Douleur hadn't been born into this House, maybe she could help me express things to Avrielle more clearly at a later date. "You are taking things personally- that is not conducive to learning. Your thinking must change."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 20:40:11 GMT -5
Finally, a question I could answer. "Valerian is the House of yielding and submission," I said. "It is also the House of receiving pain. Adepts are trained to handle pain from the age of six, when they are offered a spiced candy. This teaches that pleasure can be derived from pain. It is commonly stated that no adept or apprentice of this House may experience one without the other. Common patrons of Valerian are scions of Kushiel, God of judgement." I took a breath before continuing. "Valerian adepts are often stereotyped as cringing, crawling creatures -" my heart stung as I remembered my treatment upon my visit to Eglantine "- but in truth they are not. They are strong and beautiful. That which yields is not always weak." I finished.
"I am sorry I took your criticism personally."
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 21:01:16 GMT -5
"Common misconceptions- we are not trained from age six, only tested and spoken for. Law dictates that no specific bed-training or any other form of House-specific be taught until the earliest age of ten when a child may be dedicated into the service of Namaah. This is important because otherwise we would have no personality save for the House canon- children must be children. That adepts cannot feel pleasure without pain is another misconception in many cases- pain can heighten pleasure, seduce and draw it, but we still feel simple pleasures- we are not only our canon. And most importantly," I caught her eye, "Some adepts are cringing cowards, but it serves their purpose; they get the pain they crave and a patron gets to lash to their heart's content."
It was hard to hear the illusions of a House ripped away but she had to become learned in a very short time. "We, like all other adepts, have our own reasons for our actions, some more noble or deep than others. Here there is a sort of peace between all of us because we all need it in order to recover when necessary and protect each other from the monsters but we are still very different people all living in the same place and squabbles occur. You don't only learn things like toys and aides and how to treat a wound of perform a languisment- you have to learn to think and be a Valerian when it is required of you and that means accepting things very quickly."
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 2, 2006 21:19:24 GMT -5
This time, I did not feel hurt by his criticism, only relieved. He was finally telling me things I would really need to know, things that could not be read in books. I listened to all he was saying, resolute in my decision to become a good Valerian. I took note of things I must do in my head: Know why I was here, and learn to think like a Valerian. Problem was, I only knew how to think like myself, like Avrielle. To learn to think like a Valerian, I needed experience, and quickly. I was getting almost desperate, but I needed to apply whatever I knew so I could know what was wrong, what needed changing, because all I had was raw instinct and no skill.
Right now, I wanted him to hit me, but I knew he would not. Quite simply, I wanted to be punished for my lack of skill and my ignorance. He had said that no lash would be taken to me until my first assignation, but did that rule out being beaten as a form of regular corporal punishment? Already a situation was playing itself out in my head: My wrists were tied to a post in the courtyard and I was stripped. Gareth was asking me questions, and I was giving the wrong answer each time. With each wrong answer came another blow, until I was writhing and begging for more, that I would learn the error of my ways.
I knew my question would sound ignorant, but here it came: "Can you give me an example situation, please?"
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 3, 2006 19:09:21 GMT -5
Sighing I looked at her and said, "For example, I know how you are thinking at the moment and that you are not ready for my method of teaching. We are not communicating well and I think it best that one of our others take over your lessons from this moment on to prevent further complications and hold-ups in your education. None of us get real experience until our debut- I think that is something you are not understanding and maybe another would express it more aptly." I was not ready to have my conscience bloodied by unable to express things in a way she could not understand.
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Avrielle nó Valerian
Adept
Valerian House
Daughter of Annette n? Fronsac and Niall Southerly
Posts: 988
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Post by Avrielle nó Valerian on Oct 3, 2006 19:25:17 GMT -5
The blood pounded in my ears, and my head spun. I was being let go, and I was overwhelmed with a sense of my own helplessness. I almost fell on my knees to beg for another chance, but I knew he was right.
Stiffly, I nodded and curtseyed to him. "I will go to Trinette and ask," I said quietly. "I am sorry. May I be excused?"
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Post by Gareth nó Valerian on Oct 3, 2006 19:28:29 GMT -5
"You may return to your room, I am going to explain the situation to our Dowayne," I told her with a nod. "I am sorry as well, but sometimes people do not communicate well and that is understandable."
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