Post by Maric du Verais on Apr 17, 2009 16:20:39 GMT -5
I walked home with lightening speed, unable to do anything but huff deeply as I walked. I clenched my hands at my side as tears fell silently down my face. I was a fool, an idiot. She had known the whole time and said nothing, did nothing, she let me kiss her and play games of truth or dare... And then in the garden at her fete? Why had she allowed me to touch her so if she had no feelings for me!
So many questions ran through my mind as I walked and when I reached the Prevost Estate I wanted into the small clumping of woods instead of up to my room. I knew full well that if I went to my room I would end up breaking everything in sight and I knew I would be sent home for sure.
I opted for the woods since I could swing branches and throw stones. And I did, for what seemed like hours, as question apon question tumbled over in my brain until all I could do was fall to the ground and cry.
I loved Sophine, I loved her so much it hurt. But she wanted nothing to do with me...I was her 'brother'. And worst of all I was stuck in this gods forsaken city with a world of females that seemed to want nothing to do with me but to crush my spirit.
I lay there for a long time, feeling my body become heavy as it lay in the ground, the tears finally ceasing as I my heart grew heavy and shut down.
What point was there in love, in anything....
I was nothing but a broken soul and I had little left to care about. I rose, defeated, and began to wander back to the house. I would go on pretending, I would give every one my happy smile, my charm, my wit. But I would never be whole, and a big part of me hoped I would truly once and for all die. I had enough of this life and I was only seventeen.
So many questions ran through my mind as I walked and when I reached the Prevost Estate I wanted into the small clumping of woods instead of up to my room. I knew full well that if I went to my room I would end up breaking everything in sight and I knew I would be sent home for sure.
I opted for the woods since I could swing branches and throw stones. And I did, for what seemed like hours, as question apon question tumbled over in my brain until all I could do was fall to the ground and cry.
I loved Sophine, I loved her so much it hurt. But she wanted nothing to do with me...I was her 'brother'. And worst of all I was stuck in this gods forsaken city with a world of females that seemed to want nothing to do with me but to crush my spirit.
I lay there for a long time, feeling my body become heavy as it lay in the ground, the tears finally ceasing as I my heart grew heavy and shut down.
What point was there in love, in anything....
I was nothing but a broken soul and I had little left to care about. I rose, defeated, and began to wander back to the house. I would go on pretending, I would give every one my happy smile, my charm, my wit. But I would never be whole, and a big part of me hoped I would truly once and for all die. I had enough of this life and I was only seventeen.