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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 15, 2008 0:51:22 GMT -5
"I attempt, and practice. But only a fool, often a dead one, claims supremacy with any implement to draw blood. Usually, they are met by one a rung higher then themselves." I took another bite, noticing the red jelly oozing out the end. I swiped a morsel with my thumb, eying it glitter in the sunlight. "I don't suppose you've ever witnessed another human bleed, have you? I hear your house dungeons grant its users privy to such sights?"
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 15, 2008 0:58:58 GMT -5
I laughd this time. "Yes, I have witnessed others bleed, I have made others bleed, and I have bled myself. Blood is something you come to appreciate highly in my family, not just the sight of it but the importance of the bond it holds in a familial sense as well as a sexual sense." I watched him as he regarded the jelly from his pastry. "I don't suppose you would enjoy something like that. You probably see a great deal of blood in your line of work and so mayhap it has an entirely different meaning to you," I ventured, rather boldly. I was not one for treading on eggshells as one never gets anywhere that way.
"And our dungeons, as you say, grant privy to many varied sights," I explained.
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 15, 2008 1:09:26 GMT -5
No doubt I could feel eyes and ears perk at her response. I knew better, but I guess I wanted to see how much a cannon representative she was. "You presume I carry a weakness for such a sight," I smirked, removing the fruit from my fingers with my mouth. "I'm far more familiar with your games than you might figure, and it should be mentioned that you can only respect something when you have lived with the fear of losing it." I tilted my head to regard her.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 15, 2008 1:35:06 GMT -5
"Not entirely true on both accounts. When I said you wouldn't enjoy it, I meant simply that. In your line of work, I should think you do not get gleeful at the sight of someone else's blood, let alone your own. Also, that only works with some things -- the respecting something only once you realize you can lose it -- like life, and love. But death I do not fear in any sense, but I respect it. In not fearing death, I do not fear losing life, but I can still appreciate it's passing." I quirked my head, smiling like a fox. "And what games would these be, pray tell. We play many."
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 15, 2008 1:39:28 GMT -5
I ignored her last question, more curious on something else she said. "Don't fear death you say. A rather bold statement. And unique, mostly everyone fears death. Is your life seemingly so dull or lifeless that loosing a hold on it does not fill you with contempt or pain?" I set my pastry aside, clasping my hands together, peering at her inquisitively.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 15, 2008 2:07:21 GMT -5
"Hardly," I said with a smile. "Everyone loses it. No one keeps it. It's like trying to catch a moment in time and hold it forever. It is futile. People who do not realise the futility in holding onto life are the ones who always feel they could have done more, should have done more, and therefore, would be robbed in the end. I have the mentality that, if my life were to end now, I have accomplished all I was supposed to within my life, or else I would still be alive. My life means a great deal, but having lost others to death, I know that it is inevitable. I will not hold a child-like ignorance at this age towards something that is so altering. I respect the power of death, and question it, as it is as powerful as love or hate, but I do not fear it. To fear death is to believe that one's life means so much more than someone who has already given theirs up." It was a complicated way of explaining my thoughts, but considering his scholarly endeavours, I was certain he was able to keep up with the idea.
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 15, 2008 2:17:56 GMT -5
Well, I could say what I wanted about her house, but as a person, she was of strong will, I couldn't help but admire that. "Well, spoken indeed." I let my hands rest. "Forgive some of my earlier ill will, but I meet far to few who have a strong, and comprehensible understanding of the matter," I picked up my second pastry, "Particularly of house Shahrizai, who, forgive me for saying, seem to spend far to long dabbling in peoples lives, and treat humans as mere pawns for their own amusement."
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 15, 2008 2:30:42 GMT -5
I laughed, a soft trilling one.
"I don't fully understand what it is you have against my kin, but something tells me you will not be disclosing that anytime soon. Yes, we have a bit of a meddling nature I suppose, but you have to remember it is difficult. We are blessed, or cursed, depending on how you see it, with many, what you might call, unsavoury traits. We see fault lines in people, meaning we see what it is that will hurt them the most, their fears, their loves, the things they hate. However, some of my kin take this power too far and use it to manipulate where there is no manipulation needed, that I will grant you. Others see it, and choose not to follow that way. It is a very powerful tool, but too few really know how to wield it. Also, we do not generally have a low regard for human life or liberty. If anything we of all people esteem it. Who else could understand someone's love for pain, something that others would find abhorrent, we find beautiful. Afterall, Elua's precept above all is 'love as thou wilt'. Who is anyone to begrudge someone their pleasure when both parties are mutually acceptant? And if we are capable of bringing them pleasure, and ourselves pleasure as well, who is anyone to begrudge us our arrangement?" I was getting long winded, but I wanted him to better understand my kin, to better understand me.
"What I am trying to say is yes, there are those who throw their power too much, as there is in any family, in any country, at any given time. It doesn't make it right, it just makes them truly and utterly indulgent in who they are. There are those of us who are capable of holding back, of seeing the temptation, the lure of being ourselves completely, and hold back. I am not sure who is the stronger of the two."
I really couldn't think of much else to say. I didn't want him to think that I was something I was not. I am Kusheline, and a Shahrizai. I would be lying in saying I didn't indulge at all in my family traits. Then something dawned on me.
"You are speaking from experience." It was not a question, it was a statement. One I should probably have kept to myself, but it astonished me, if, that is, it were indeed true.
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 15, 2008 2:39:24 GMT -5
I blinked. "Quite the spirited defense." I took an interesting note of her last comment, thinking it through. I'd always had that paradox on my outlook. Was I better off resisting such a curiosity.
"I wonder if a bloodline didn't keep such a rigid re-production of their family 'traditions', might we as a people lament its loss, or consider ourselves bettered because of such confounding desires?" I asked curiously, beginning to feel a small twinge of regret taking on such a deep topic on a rather airy day.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 15, 2008 2:57:27 GMT -5
"A defense to suit the offence, I am sure," I said with a chuckle. But his second comment unsettled me a bit. It was laced with so much double meaning it could have been coming from a cousin.
"It sounds like you are speaking on a bit of imbreeding. That can be a touchy subject with my kin. If you ask me, a half blooded Shahrizai is still a Shahrizai, regardless of how, excuse the expression, but 'watered down' the bloodline becomes. However, if we were utterly and completely annihilated, the world would be right to lament the loss, as it would and has in other cases. The extinction of a people is certainly to humanity's detriment. Think of all the knowledge that the world has lost in the death of a people. All the understanding. And yes, all the tradition. Tradition is something that helps us define ourselves, whether we go with it, or against it." I could feel the air getting heavy around us.
"Mayhap we should talk on something less... oppressing?" I asked, offering him an easy out should he want to take it.
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 15, 2008 3:10:57 GMT -5
I sighed, humbled slightly, and chuckled. "An appeal to understanding, yes I suppose that would be the case." I was kind of disappointed, I wouldn't have minded continuing the train of thought. But, saying something now will only invite trouble I think. Still, I would not think she would see 'half-blood' in that much of a brighter light.
"It sounds like your burning with a curiosity that I've been derailing you from." I commented.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 15, 2008 7:02:38 GMT -5
"To tell you the truth," I started. As much as I was myself, I did not want to press him or offend him. "Well since the moment you started speaking you were against my kin, even when we weren't overtly talking about it. Yes, you appologized, and I accept that appology, but I can't help but wonder why someone is so vehement, other than that he may have been slighted by one of us. And then your questions... who wronged you?" I asked quietly. It was a far more personal question than we had been discussing, but somthing told me that this was the question and answer we had been skirting around during our discussion.
I laughed then, "I guess I didn't do much for steering us into a less burdensome direction, did I?" I asked with a calm smile. I didn't mind discussing heavy matters, I just didn't think he felt comfortable.
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 0:32:05 GMT -5
"No, I probably didn't help the situation by staying here for entertainment." I smirked. "If you must know, my father lost his life when I was but a child because he got on the wrong side of Kushline politics and Shahrizai games." I said with a raised eyebrow. "As you can imagine, my sympathy is of shallow amounts on your kin, despite your best intentions," I sighed leaning back, talking quite. "It's not your fault, I couldn't blame you personally, but you do so very emulate that which took what I loved, a child's love,"
I think I was somewhat relieved to expel these thoughts on kin. "Matters of flesh and desire of ultimately of little importance compared to treachery and dishonesty, trademarks that I've not seen much improvement on, at least at this point."
It was at this point that the heads turned in our direction were of some majority. "I think perhaps I've overstated my position, but it was...interesting at least," I smiled, moving to get up.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 1:23:03 GMT -5
By this time I was gettin fairly livid. I am not the closest to my family, but I will not have someone sitting there judging me when they don't know me.
"Well," I said spitefully, "serves him right for mingling in Shahrizai business. What was he doing, poking his nose where it doesn't belong?" I was hoping this would get his attention. I wasn't done, and there was no way he was walking away after leaving me with that last bit of information. It may not have been the most sensitive way to go about things, but sensitive didn't seem to be working with him.
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 1:28:40 GMT -5
It was strange, I never really knew my father well, nor the life he lead. And as for myself, I am usually humble, and willing to let insults slide. However, it seemed my pride always was pricked by insults to him. I was simultaneously aware of what I said, yet I was unable to really control the venomous words that spilled quietly from my mouth.
"You, my fair lady, should be wary of such snide remarks. If it wasn't for ones like you, he might have truly escaped that clandistine heirarchy, and led a much freer life, away from all the unnecessary scheming. But, I suppose a mouth that no longer wants to play catch is just cat food, isn't it?"
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 1:32:49 GMT -5
"No, a mouth that decides it has the right to belittle someone else's family because it suits their needs, and cannot take back what they dish, is cat food. Life is about choices. You mean to tell me your father never made a wrong choice in his life that could have lead him to his, apparently, untimely demise? Make sure you aren't just pointing blame because you don't know how to cope with the loss of a loved one, dear sir." I was on my feet now. I never was one for public scenes. I waltzed away from him, leaving a wake of confused and frightened customers as they parted to make way for me. The pastry shop felt too constricting and I needed air.
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 1:52:00 GMT -5
She rose deftly, leaving behind a small trail of arrogance as she left. How dare she! I thought. But...part of her was right. But, something still got to me, I followed after her, stopping her outside, on the shoulder.
"That may be, but it sounded like you just justified murder, something that I find rather appalling. Surely, that's not the case, is it?"
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 1:54:31 GMT -5
"Well how about you tell me your story instead of dancing a rather fetching waltz around it. I am one of them you know, my patience can only last so long as you sit there and call the members of my family common dogs." My chest was heaving as I tried to calm myself.
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 2:05:02 GMT -5
"Are you being cynical, or are you just looking for a free escort back to your home?" I reposed a bit snide, also a bit amused. I could feel the emotion of me accepting, that Siovalian curiosity nudging me to learn.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 2:54:38 GMT -5
"How about yours? I don't think you would like an introduction to a Shahrizai home, or mayhap more mutual ground? A garden or the square?" I offered. He piqued my interest, and I really did want to change his mind on the Shahrizai. There was something there he was not telling me, and I was determined to get to the bottom of the mystery. But Gods! He was stubborn.
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 3:02:30 GMT -5
"What, now you want to see 'my' house?" She was a mystery, that was for certain. If she was just here to insult me, she would have put more emphasis on it, I suppose. "What are expecting to find, secret documents of planned assassinations on members of Kushline royalty?" I said with humorous absurdity.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 3:56:53 GMT -5
"No, I just plan on finding out what it is we've done to you to make you so ridiculously angry, beyond reason! And to think, I thought you might have had a semblage of a brain. You cannot sit there and insult someone's family and expect that just because you have been slighted you can get away with it. By calling my family murderers, and expecting no less of me, you are not speaking volumes for my character, and I happen to be fairly attached to it to have it berated like that."
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Tabién de Valclesa(I)
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 4:07:32 GMT -5
"Why do I have the distinct feeling that If I were to walk away from you right now, I'd only be earning a deep ire from you that I might regret later..." I said for a moment, starting to walk, and silently motioning her to follow. "And no, that wasn't another shot at your house, just a curious insight on my part of your person."
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 4:08:46 GMT -5
"Because you are right," he was reading fault lines and didn't even know it! He must have some of us in him. I slowly followed him. "Where exactly am I following you?"
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 4:17:43 GMT -5
I laughed, " I don't know, I'll worry about the destination when it arrives, I think the important thing is that we keep moving else we draw to much attention to ourselves.
"You're not afraid I'll take you back somewhere to silence you, are you?" I asked sidelong.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 4:24:43 GMT -5
I chuckled in disbelief. "I am not your typical damsel in distress. I am very capable on my own." I followed him, holding my head a tad higher, haughtilly.
"Are you even going to answer my question or are you leading me away to attempt to get under my skirt?" I asked, teasing him now.
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 4:32:39 GMT -5
"Well, I don't know where your house is, so I'm going back home. I suppose you'd just follow me anyways." I shrugged, still letting her keep pace, though I could lose her easily if I wanted.
"Nice to see you think of in the lowest regards in every respect, m'lady Sarielle."
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 4:34:42 GMT -5
"I am happy to return the favour, I am sure," I uttered, my both dripping with equal parts honey and venom. "You know, you act like a cousin."
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Post by Tabién de Valclesa(I) on Dec 16, 2008 4:37:56 GMT -5
I felt my blood a tinge at her comment. My eyes shift her into view for a moment, head remaining in front, then tilting back. Can't tell if that's a compliment or a condeming. "And do you mean by that?" I asked, we making slow pace through the city streets.
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Post by Sarielle Shahrizai on Dec 16, 2008 9:15:46 GMT -5
"Your mind games and double meanings, word play and riddles. I wouldn't be surprised if you had a bit of the Shahrizai blood you hate so much, inside you." I said with a harsh laugh. I couldn't even imagine. If he did have any of the kin blood, then he must tear himself up every night at the dichotomy of his urges.
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