Walking the Halls

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

It had started with a dream... no, scratch that, a night mare. I woke up in the middle of the night, dreaming strange dreams that made me bolt from my bed. They were always dark, blacks and blues, and sea grey... the sea, yes, that was part of it. I remembered the sea and a figure with black hair but I couldn't see his face or recognize him.

The dreams plagued me and made my chest ache, when I woke I couldn't remember much other then the colours and the sea, and the lone figure that stood reaching out to me.

The morning had seen me working on my commissions, I was still working on Shea's out fit for the upcoming wedding. But the afternoon yielded nothing but an upset stomach and the need to mope around the halls of my House.

I wrapped my arms around me and did just that, trying to think of my dreams and what they meant.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

Most people could figure out when I was awake, mostly because it was accompanied by squeals and screams of laughter by the younger adepts who were too young to begin their services to Naamah and were currently in training, some of them lonely for their mothers and of home, others content with their place. I had one little girl on my shoulder and a few holding onto my feet and making me drag them towards the mesh hall, but I paused when I saw Brigitte. Children were one thing. They were easily upset and put to tears, but just as easily set to a smile and a giggle, when one knew them well enough. Adults, however, were always another thing entirely for their problems were almost always more complicated than I would have liked.

I put the girl on my shoulder down and shooed the others away before I moved to give Brigitte I good grab on her hips from behind. "Now, now... no moping." I did not have my mandolin at the moment, otherwise I surely would have burst into song already, but I had thought that all I was going to do was catch my breakfast before I headed to practice and teach a few lessons. "What's wrong, dove?" I asked, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"C'mon, you can tell your big brother Bellamy."

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I had been so deep in thought then when I felt hands on my hips I gasped a little, only to hear the familiar sound of the House's second behind me. I sighed, and accepted his good natured question as well as the kiss he placed on my cheek and though part of me detested it I leaned back a little against him.
"Trying to save the world again Bellamy?" I asked sardonically, ignoring everything else he said to me.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

"Save the world my dear? No, I have never been one for heroics. I'm quite a coward, actually." I said this all with such ease, as if I were talking about the weather and I could only hope she could find some humor in it. She seemed to be in such a foul mood and it certainly did not fit the mood of Eglantine. Even if I had no been Eglantine's Second, I would have seen it as my job to slip her under my wing and try to make things better.

When she leaned back against me, my fingers curled around her shoulder a little. "Well, every good day needs some breakfast, plus I was thinking about heading out to the market before the classes I needed to teach, what do you think about joining me?" It was still relatively early in the morning and we could catch it before the afternoon crowd swept in. Actually, I had it in mind to practice before my first lesson but I always made an exception.

"We don't even have to talk about your problem if you don't want to. Sometimes its best not to talk about such things," I offered with a smile touching my lips. "Don't be so sour my dear, at least try to THINK positively, hm?"

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I furrowed my brows and spun, looking at him with my arms crossed over my body still.
"And who says I have a problem huh?" I asked as I looked at him. "What, is there another vile rumour running around about me?"

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

Oh. It was like I had upset a feral cat on a bad day.

I put my hands up, as I surrendering, but quickly moved to massage her shoulders. "So tense, my dear, you know that I do not listen to that." Darling. What had happened to her? Surely no one who belonged to Eglantine House under my watch had a reason to act this way, unless I was doing a horrendous job. "No vile rumor, your face tells it all and I can read you like a book." I cupped her hands in my face and kissed her gingerly on the forehead as if I thought that anything else would give her reason to murder me with that glare of hers.

"I want you to lighten up, that's all. Smile a little. If there is anything wrong, tell me your troubles and if you say there is not, we will go out for breakfast and I will make you go out to the market with me." Nope. She was not getting out of it this time. I was going to MAKE her go with that attitude. My punishments were never with whips, after all.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I narrowed my gaze at him and stepped to him, pushing the boundaries of propriety and his friendly nature.
"I'm not some young fostering Bellamy, I can't be fixed with breakfast and a light chat." I said as I looked him, my arms still crossed and pressed against him as I looked at him sternly.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

I frowned, when she said my name and gave me that look, I knew she was serious and I really hated serious situations. My mandolin surely would have helped in this situation and I remembered why I never left it anywhere. Well, that and the fact I was sick and tired of catching some of the younger adepts strumming on it. Nobody touched my mandolin but me.

"Well, what can you be fixed with then? I am not saying you are a young fosterling, but do know Brigitte, darling, that sometimes everyone likes to feel like they're a child and it's not like you will ever get too grown up to need someone to talk to. You're only but a girl, whether or not you would like to admit it. Even I would need someone to talk to every now and then. It lifts a weight off one's shoulders." Whether or not she liked it, I pulled her into a tight hug even with her arms crossed and pressed her head gently into my chest with my free hand.

"Like I said... you may have 'adult' and oh so big problems that you must carry upon your shoulders, but I quite frankly believe you will get over it. You're Eglantine House. We chose you for greatness and that is what you will always display. You'll create a way to get yourself out of this, even if you don't need my help." I gave her an affectionate tap on the nose as I pulled away. "Who said breakfast was going to fix this, anyway? I just want breakfast and a pretty young lass to share it with."

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I was incensed, so shocked that I couldn't move, and when he pulled away I did the only thing that I could think of. I raised my hand back and slapped him across the face, not overly hard, but his words made me mader then a blazing fire and something in my snapped. I knew I was likely to get in much trouble, but I didn't care, Calandria knew how I felt about this place, she also knew my intolerance to authority figures.
"I'm only a girl?" I asked as I looked at him. "I repeat Bellamy, I'm not some stupid fosterling. You should hear yourself talk, you're so condesending." I narrowed my gaze at him, my arms crossed over my chest again.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

It was as if the sound of her palm connecting with my face echoed throughout the hall, I swore there was a moment of silence, at least one ringing in my ears and for me, time seemed to stand still as I stared at her in disbelief.

"B-Brigitte..." I had this undying love for all the adepts in my house and she was no different, whether or not she had laid a hand on me, however, I just could not believe I had pushed someone that far to WANT to slap me, especially since I had not been trying to be offensive, nor had I been angry. "I didn't mean it in that way, Brigitte, please," I said, my voice stressing my innocence as I dared to put my hands on her arms, giving them a squeeze. "I did not discredit you in any way, you are blossoming into the most amazing young woman. You're still in your youth, that is all I meant to say, and there is no shame in needing someone, youth or no youth."

I pulled away, in case she decided to punch me after my little bit and bowed my head a little. "Brigitte, I am not talking to you as your Second but just as your friend... please."

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I chewed the inside of my lip as I sighed and looked at him.
"Fine." I said softly and relaxed my jaw a little. "I'm sorry I slapped you." I murmured as well before looking down at my feet as I kicked the air gently with my slippered foot.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

"I did not ask you to apologize."

I said it simply, not meant to be curt or frank or sarcastic and I made sure to keep my hands in my pockets then, trying to keep from inciting her rage. "Apparently you are going through something that any other person would stray from and not interfere. I'm not them, Brigitte." Unable to help myself, my hand was soon out of my pocket and around her shoulders as I led her over to the dining hall for breakfast.

"Perhaps a little food will settle things for you, who knows?" As long as she wasn't scratching me like a cat, I would continually be by her side, trying to make things better.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I sighed in exasperation, arms crossed tightly across me, but I did not protest. I merely rolled my eyes and let him guide me.
"Fine." I echoed as I walked.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

"Don't be a sour puss," I said ever so gently. I did not want to offend her again and I guided her into the dining hall and gave her a place to sit, giving her shoulders a tight squeeze as I leaned over here. "Just sit here, relax, okay?" I said before I took my seat next to her and gave her a smile.

"Did you want to come to the market with me today? I had it in mind to buy some fresh fruits and I'll gladly do the same for you, if you wish." It was a simple thing and fruit was not too expensive, but it was the small things in the end that counted.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I sighed, pursing my lips as I looked at him.
"I suppose." I murmured before sighing again, arms still crossed against me.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

Well, we were making progress. At the very least she decided that she wanted to come with me to the Market and I supposed that that was much better than her slapping me in the middle of the hallway. I wrapped an arm around her shoulders and used my other to get us some food and I started to eat, giving her a look and hoping she would follow suit.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I pushed at him the moment he put his arm around me and elbowed him in the process.
"No touching please, I'll sit with your Highness but I don't need to be touched. You of all people should know that one must pay before they allow that." I raised a brow and gave him a bitter, sardonic smile.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

I stared at her in disbelief when she pushed me away and could not help but let out a noise when she elbowed me. I was one that was sensitive to pain. Very sensitive. I was used to physical contact and not necessarily in the physical way. Piggy back rides and pinches on the cheeks were my kind of thing and I could only wonder if I had done something to make her mad at me. Honestly, I couldn't recall a thing though now I was starting to be slightly paranoid and wonder if I had forgotten something. Maybe I had reprimanded her when she had been younger and she still hated me for that? There was a look of confusion on my face and concern, not to mention hurt pride as I kept my hands to myself. It was odd, eating like this.

"I am not trying to contract you, nor am I trying to do anything that would require a patron-adept relationship, I assure you." I held my hands in front of me, giving her a mock surrender. "I am merely treating you as I would a friend. Do your friends not give you hugs and the like?"

Maybe THAT was why she was so bitter. I would be bitter if my friends never touched me.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I sighed and looked to him, my hands uncrossing as me eyes met his.
"You better then any one should know I don't have friends Bellamy." I said firmly, with only a hint of bitterness. I didn't need friends really.
"And I don't like to be touched unless its something I want, and right now I don't want to be touched, alright?" I asked with raised brows and then sighed again, turning to look forward. I knew I was being rude to him, it made it especially worse knowing that he was only trying to help, deluded though it migh be.
"I'm sorry, I'm just not in the mood to be comforted like that." I whispered softly.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

"Uhm... why should I know better than anyone?" I asked. Not that I didn't care about her. I cared dearly for Brigitte, just like I cared for all my other adepts, but I had many on my hands so was I her keeper or something? Was that why I should know better than anyone? I noticed the bitter tone in my thoughts and had to beat it out. Now, that wouldn't help anyone.

"Uhm... okay?" I said, blinking, unsure of where the aggression was coming from. I wasn't even getting flustered about how she was acting. Right to the point, I was confused out of my mind. "I didn't do anything, right? I didn't happen to harm you as a child or give you some unkind punishment?" Surely I hadn't done anything like that!

"Well... then, how would you like to be comforted?" I asked, leaning my head on my hand as I looked her over. If not through hugs and cuddles, then what?

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I was starting to feel frustrated again and turned to him, leaning in to whisper, it wasn't like I wanted others seeing or hearing me talk to Bellamy. My eyes locked with his though.
"You are so sefl involved Bellamy." I began, trying to keep my voice low. "You think you do such a great job being parents to these children. I don't know, may be you do, but you don't know anything about me and you have no idea to treat me. Not to mention the fact that this some how became all about you." My voice was a quiet but I was having a hard time containing the tone. I placed a hand on the table and rose, looking down at him as he sat.
"If you knew anything about me at all you'd know I don't have friends, and if I do need to be comforted, being touched is the last thing I want." I said as I let out a breath and turned, leaving him sitting there as I made my escape. I needed a place to hide, and now I needed a place to cry. I just hoped I would make it to the hallway before I broke down.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

It felt like I was getting repeatedly stabbed over and over again and I really had no way of defending myself from the violent onslaught. "How did this become about me?" I asked, quite unsure and wanted nothing more than to reach out to her, though she wanted anything but that. It left me between a rock and a hard place and unfortunately, I wasn't the kind of person smart enough to get out of the situation, even if it was for my own good. She felt horrible, which made me feel equally so, and it certainly didn't help that she was bombarding me with her insults as well.

"Then tell me how, Brigitte," I said, my voice pained and as she rose, I followed after her quickly. "I won't touch you anymore, not if that isn't what you want," I offered, pleading. "I'm... I'll be your friend if you let me." I didn't know if she didn't have friends because she refused to allow herself any or because she had done something, I wasn't sure, but her attitude could really turn a person off, but I tried to ignore it. She was hurting. That was the reason. "Really, I will... just... just tell me how."

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I ran my hands over my head as I broke free of the dinning hall, only to be followed by Bellamy. The hallway was empty, which I was thankful for, and I turned to him feeling an edge of frustration and tears welling.
"Just, don't act like you know me. And stop pretending you're my buddy just because you're second of this gods forsaken place." I turned and hurried down the hall till I found an unlocked door, opening it to find a mostly dark room in which I could break down and cry. Once I was out of the hallway, thats what I did, burrying my face in my hands as I did.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

"I... that's not why I'm doing it," I said quietly, eyebrows furrowed. Ever since I had paid off my marque, I tried to help those who were younger than me and struggling and it seemed that Brigitte wanted none of my help. My wiser judgment told me to just leave her alone because she obviously needed her space, but at the same time, I wasn't sure if I should. She might hurt herself and maybe it was a cry for attention? I really didn't know at this point.

I didn't open the door but I sat outside of it, hearing her cry and sighed loudly. "Why do you want me to pretend like I don't know you? Why are you so opposed to having somebody care about you...?"

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I sobbed into my hands for a little while longer before rising and going to the door. Opening it I looked at him and then turn, leaving the door open for him to come in after me. I didn't feel like being out in the halls as I spoke, I knew there were rumours that went around about me and I didn't need more.

Finding a chair I sat down and bent at the waist as I rested my forehead in my hands.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

I lifted my head when the door was opened and my jaw slackened just a little. Following after her, I pulled up a chair to sit near her and for one of the first times, I was left in silence. I wanted her to speak on her own accord and not make me force out any of her problems for her. I reached out a hand, about to stroke her head to console her but pulled back and laid them, wringing in my lap to prevent from doing anything that would infuriate her in her fragile state.

"I'm here, Brigitte..."

That's all I said and I think, that's all she needed.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I stayed still, not saying or doing anything until he touched my head and then pulled away. I looked up at him for a moment and then began to sob once more into my hands.
For a time that was all I could do.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

I moved my chair a little closer and wrapped my arm around her without touching her, just so that she knew I was here and if she needed, I could hold her. I knew how to cheer people up... or at least, I thought I did, but with Brigitte things were so different and I found myself needing to approach the situation entirely differently from what I normally would have done. I let her cry, for I knew she had probably held it in for so long. "It's alright..." I said, murmuring anything I could think of that would be comforting without offending her.

[Brigitte nó Eglantine (D)]

I cried for a time, happy that Bellamy was letting me have the moment to simply do just that and cry. But at the same time, I couldn't help but appreciate his company, at least for the moment.
When I had cried enough I began to stop and sniffed, wiping the tears away as I looked at him.
"Thank you." I said softly.

[Bellamy nó Eglantine]

"Of course you are welcome anytime." It meant something different to Brigitte and I, I think, that moment, than it would have with others. I was used to, as a Second, dealing with the new and young adepts, teaching and training them to hone whatever skills they had that I seemed to have neglected how to handle the older ones, as Brigitte had pointed out to me (though a tad harshly, I did admit, it was necessary). I moved away from her, giving her a small smile.

"You do not have to tell me what it is that has upset you. Just know that I'll always be here if you ever need somebody. You're not alone, dear."