|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 15:57:34 GMT -5
Gods, but I wanted to lash out. Why was he being so rash? I had beseeched him to be careful, but a brick might have had more care.
"Justin," I said carefully and quietly, "Elua knows I am glad to be with you once again, but the Duc has yet to determine how he feels about you and our engagement. I pray that we will come to a decision that pleases us all today, but I have not heard any threats, merely various predictions and hypotheticals. Please, why not tell him of the excellent quality of your character, and what you can offer me as my husband?"
Both men were subtle, I knew they would discern my true meaning: That I truly wanted our engagement to work out, but that I also wanted Justin to speak more respectfully, and that I was on nobody's side.
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 16:17:40 GMT -5
Elua! Some how I managed to madden her as well.
"Not today." I said turning to her. "I'm sure the Duc told you all the horrible things I said, but he did tell me that he was going to tell your father to reconsider his approval and that I was not allowed to see you again." I said furrowing my brow.
"You haven't even heard my side of that happened." My last words were sad. "You weren't there yesterday and you didn't hear the way he talked about us. Telling me that just because I had spent a night between your legs that I was in love." I furrowed my brow some more. I turned and looked at the Duc then back to Avive.
"If we marry, will this what things will be like?" My voice was calm in complete serious wonder. "If their's an argument between your cousin and I, you will side with him? Or am I misunderstanding. Because some how I managed to make you mad even though I was just being honest with the Duc."
"Because if it is, then I can offer nothing as a husband except money." I shook my head bitting my lip and trying not to feel hurt.
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 16:33:14 GMT -5
I kept all offense from my voice. "I am not angry with you," I told him, voice calm and serene as water. "And if by my advice I have offended you, I earnestly ask forgiveness. I merely wished that instead of arguing amongst us, we may speak of the things that truly matter: Our plans for the future, and of course, how we feel about one another. I am grateful for your honesty and for your presence here, more than I can show now, and I want to marry you."
"My cousin was open and honest with me about everything that was said yesterday, and as a woman of my own mind, I am sorry that so many harsh words were exchanged. Ever have I been humble and honest, merely seeking truth where it hides and striving for goodness in my own life." I looked at Alain and smiled. "I have a good cousin, who has been a constant guardian, providing for all my needs and giving me his love unconditionally." I looked then to Justin. "And I have a good suitor, one who has promised to be a good and faithful husband, one who has professed his love, who will care for me for all my days." I smiled at Justin.
"As a woman of my own mind, I can make my own decisions, and I am no one's instrument. I may only, as a woman of intelligence and clear thought, pursue the best course. Justin, I know you can offer me love, security, honesty and faithfulness, but the Duc does not know it yet. I beg of you, as you are intelligent and learned, to show him your true character, one unmarred by anger." At this, I gave him a wide, loving smile. Turning to Alain, "And I ask you, dear cousin, to be careful and thoughtful in your judgment, though I am confident you will be."
The next words were addressed to both Alain and Justin. "There have been some rash words spoken here today. But rather than let this pleasant luncheon dissolve into another argument, I wish, again, as my own woman of sound mind, that we may all speak civilly, without accusations or threats. I wish not to pit you one against the other, for I fear that is the road down which we are headed. That is my dearest hope for this day, my lords, and as you both love me, please understand how deep and good my intentions are, and how I only want the best for all."
|
|
|
Post by Alain de Mauvais (D) on Jun 14, 2008 18:59:10 GMT -5
My expression of calm never wavered, only my eyes moved from one to the other as they spoke.
And somehow – somehow – I managed not to grab the little snot by the hair and smash his face into the table.
“Messieur Rocaille, again you attribute things to me that I have never done or said. I told both of you yesterday that I had yet to make up my mind about whether or not I liked you. I also said that if I did decide to forbid this marriage you would never see Avive again, I made no declarative statement on a final outcome.” My voice remained as calm as my expression. “And again you impugn my character by assuming that I would not have told Avive the truth about what happened between us. I may have spared her the lurid language, but I admitted my part in things and took responsibility. I also made it clear to Avive that I did not want nor expect her to defend me against you, it was her impartiality that I asked for.”
“I came here for Avive, because I love her and want to see her happy. She was certain that if we met again and were calm that I would see in you what she does, but so far I have seen nothing to change my impression of you from yesterday.”
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 19:37:25 GMT -5
I snorted, softly, once and turned to Avive. "You may be a woman of no one's instrument but you've made it clear that you won't proceed with the engagement without your cousins's blessing." I said softly and sighing. "The only way your cousin will see my true character is if he's willing to see it, but if he chooses to hate me I can not change his mind. What if he indeed does not give his blessing?" I asked curiously gesturing to him and the comments he just made. "What will you do, will you shrink away or will you marry me either way."
|
|
|
Post by Alain de Mauvais (D) on Jun 14, 2008 19:43:57 GMT -5
How could Avive love this boy? Or even like him? Every time he was faced with his own words and actions he refused to acknowledge them and take any responsibility. Gods above know that I had been that young and reckless before, but I had never ever been so gutless.
None of those thoughts showed on my face or in my gaze as I looked at Avive. There was no pressure or demands in my look, only wondering at her answer.
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 20:56:10 GMT -5
"Shrink away?" I asked. "I have faced these past days with goodwill and openmindedness, praying constantly that everything would work out. I was willing to place great value on the two days I have known you, because when we were together you were intelligent, charming, tender, and seemed thrilled to wed me. And I too was thrilled, for it seemed all my greatest desires, a loving husband and a family of my own, were at hand. You were so full of life, so good to me, so eager to be a part of my life, that I immediately desired to give myself to you. But before I met you, I had another family, whose happiness and security are equally important."
"No Justin, I will not shrink away, but neither will I stand down. This blessing is important to me because it not only means I may wed you and we may be happy together all our days, it means there will be harmony in both the Mauvais family, in the relations between our families, and in the duchy of Siovale."
I lowered my voice, murmuring words meant for Justin alone. "What I tell you now is the truth. Alain has made no final judgments about your character or decisions about the betrothal. I begged him for this chance and I fear now it is slipping away. You fear he will hate you, but it is up to you to show him the likable things about you. I have praised you, but my words can only go so far." I felt myself tearing, but I swallowed. "Please. I have done everything I can for you, but I need your help now."
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 21:25:47 GMT -5
"You are not the only one who has suffered Avive." I said defeatedly. "I feel as though I have been beat down for wanting to marry you and that I can not make him or you happy without sacrificing everything I am. You're asking me to do as he wills, to make him happy and I fear that will never happen no matter what I do. I fear that I will loose myself in trying to bend to your will and your cousins. You said that this blessing means the most to you Avive, but what about what's important to me?" I furrowed my brows. "You cousin claims I was rude, fine. I'll apologize. But what about what he's done to me?" I asked .
"Will you ask him to apologize to me?" I wasn't asking her to but I was curious if she would show me the same respect. "You said that he told you what happened. But that's his side of what happened. You asked me to come here and put myself on the line so that he could judge me." I furrowed my brows and shook my head.
"He called you a child Avive, he said that he wouldn't let you marry me. He said that you couldn't choose a husband on your own. And he said that he could make you change your mind." I was being put in a corner by both of them and I was beginning to regret the whole arrangement. "You want me to think about your family, about being in harmony with them. But how can I be in harmony with people that say one thing to your face and another behind your back. That make your suitor's jump through hoops to please them." I didn't know where to go from there. I was sure that the Duc would attack me but I couldn't sacrifice that much of myself. "You're asking alot from me to know that there is more then a good possibility that we will not wed."
|
|
|
Post by Alain de Mauvais (D) on Jun 14, 2008 21:36:34 GMT -5
“I said she was a child to the world when she came to the City,” I said, my calm shredding around the edges. “I said that I wondered if she knew how you refused to defend your words would change her mind about you. You have called me uncaring, a tyrant, and a liar as well as accusing me of doing a list of things I’ve never done. I have apologized to Avive repeatedly and not lied to her about a thing. I was prepared to apologize to you, but I couldn’t get a word in between the added accusations and slanders.”
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 22:03:29 GMT -5
I sat shocked, utterly stumped about how now to proceed. "It seems that apologies are owed all around," I murmured carefully. I knew Alain didn't think he owed Justin an apology at all, but it seemed to me that Justin's fear combined with his hurts was due to his encounter with Alain. And of course, Justin owed Alain an apology for slandering him. "May I be blunt with you, my lords?" I asked.
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 22:27:57 GMT -5
"Of course Avive, you do not need my permission to speak you mind." I gave a soft smile.
|
|
|
Post by Alain de Mauvais (D) on Jun 14, 2008 23:28:02 GMT -5
My gaze narrowed slightly, not missing the implication that she had to ask to speak freely around me.
My fingers tightened slightly on the arms of my chair, but I just looked at Avive and nodded.
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 14, 2008 23:44:08 GMT -5
"Justin, I believe you owe the Duc an apology," I began, "for insulting his character, and slandering his good name."
"But Alain," I said, "I feel that you too, owe an apology to Justin, for intimidating him, whether you meant to or not."
"It is possible you both may feel that no apologies are owed. But I came here with a mind to be as fair as possible, and from what I have heard, there have been wrongs committed on both sides, and both of you have felt hurt. I am also not entirely blameless, for I have also been unkind and unfair, and for that I am deeply sorry." I took a deep breath. "Therefore, it seems fair that apologies be made for the hurts and unkindnesses that have passed before."
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 15, 2008 12:16:21 GMT -5
I gritted my teeth and stayed looking at Avive for a moment. Come on Justin, what's more important?
"My lord Duc," I said looking at him and schooling my features. "Please forgive my actions." I took a breath. "I'm afraid I let my emotions get the better of me and my actions were unbecoming of some one asking for permission to wed a beloved family member." I glanced to Avive then back to Alain. "It's important to me that you approve of me and I will do what's needed to make her happy."
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 16, 2008 8:48:49 GMT -5
At last, the first big step was taken, and I was relieved that Justin had taken it. Alain had yet to reply.
|
|
|
Post by Alain de Mauvais (D) on Jun 19, 2008 15:43:32 GMT -5
“Apology accepted. I apologize as well for my part in everything. You two may do as you wish,” I said. I pushed my chair back and stood up. “Enjoy your lunch; I must get back to business.”
I squeezed Avive’s arm and then took my leave.
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 19, 2008 15:47:56 GMT -5
"Thank you, Alain," I called after him, but he was already gone. I turned to Justin, unsure whether I should laugh or cry. "Justin," I said softly, "I think he just gave us permission to marry."
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 19, 2008 16:22:00 GMT -5
I shrugged and watched him sculk off. "Great." I said sarcastically then turned to the table before me.
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 19, 2008 18:26:39 GMT -5
My words of thanks to him nearly died on my lips, but I reminded myself that he was probably still angry and was taking it out on me. "I know it didn't go as smoothly as we'd hoped," I said carefully, "but thank you for apologizing. I appreciate it very much."
In the back of my head, I could feel a slight pounding, but I tried to ignore it. I would speak with him about not taking his anger out on me when he was calmer. "Are you all right?" I asked worriedly.
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 20, 2008 10:43:33 GMT -5
I sighed and touched my hand to my forehead, I was warm and my ran my hand over my shoulder pushing at the muscles. . "I think so," I said turning to her. "That should have gone better Avive." I said softly and took her hand in mine.
"Lets get out of here." I said reaching to my purse and pulling out enough coin to purchase the drinks and then turned back to her. "What do you think, my town house?"
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 20, 2008 13:19:12 GMT -5
I shook my head, fighting back a wave of nausea. "I don't feel so well," I said truthfully. "I need to lie down. But I am sure I will feel better tomorrow."
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 20, 2008 14:30:07 GMT -5
I furrowed my brows. "You don't look well." I said standing and holding out my hand for her to help her up from her chair. "Come on," I said smiling. "I'm taking you home."
|
|
|
Post by Avive de Rocaille on Jun 20, 2008 14:51:07 GMT -5
I took his hand to stand, and immediately was weak in the knees. I gripped his hand to steady myself. "Thank you," I whispered, the pounding in my head growing my the minute.
|
|
|
Post by Justin de Rocaille on Jun 20, 2008 22:17:55 GMT -5
I held her hand firmly and walked us out the door. Alain had taken the carriage they arrived in so I hired one, help Avive in and hurried on our way...
Not exactly what I had planned but I think we were both feeling ill after this. It was best to just return and speak the next day.
|
|